


DON'T SAY MY NAME!

by SammyKink



Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Bottom Jared Padalecki, M/M, Nipple Play, Prostate Examinations, Top Jensen Ackles
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-07
Updated: 2021-02-21
Packaged: 2021-03-07 00:21:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 35,822
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26344042
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SammyKink/pseuds/SammyKink
Summary: Jensen Ackles is 30, a successful Andrologist in his father owned clinic and a doting dad to his 7 year old daughter.Jared Padalecki is 24, a software engineer, freshly engaged to his highschool sweetheart, Genevieve.Fate intervenes when Jared encounters a problem and seeks Jensen's expert advice. What that meeting entails in their future lives is something they both didn't anticipate.
Relationships: Jensen Ackles/Jared Padalecki
Comments: 83
Kudos: 127





	1. Chapter 1

The receptionist at the "Ackles Sex Wellness Clinic" picked the phone on the second ring. "Yes, Dr. Ackles?"

The voice on the other side crackled over the receiver. "How many more to go?" 

"All of your other previous appointments are done, Dr. Ackles. It's just the last one, the emergency appointment that came at the last minute. Should I cancel?"

There's a brief pause on the other end and then the receiver came to life again. "No worries, send him in."

"Okay, Dr. Ackles. Will do it rght away," she replaced the receiver on the hook as she called out the last patient of the day. "Mr. Padalecki, you may go in now. The doctor will see you."

\-------------------

Jensen cracked his knuckles and stretched his back muscles. He expected the day to be a bit slow so he could get back home early. Looked like he's not going to make it back home on time. He worked as an Andrologist cum sex counselor at the ACKLES SEX WELLNESS CLINIC that was founded by his father and was now being successfully run by Jensen and a few other doctors. He'd been practicing for the last 5 years and his popularity had been growing steadily and the flow of his clientele was mostly due to a good word of mouth.

Jensen dialed Daneel's number from his cell phone. 

"Hey doll, looks like I might be a little late today too, so why don't you take Noel to Meg's today? Tell Noel that we'd take her to the movie coming weekend. Tell her that I promise."

Daneel sounded alright from the other end. "So, what else is new, Dr. Sexy? No problem, I'll take care of it, I'll tell Noel that the date has been moved to Friday, okay?"

"Thanks dear, I know I can always count on you." He placed a kiss on the phone and cut the call. 

He took the case file of the last patient from the top of the pile and fingered through it. 

Name: Jared Padalecki.  
Age:. 24.  
Profession: Software Engineer.  
Diagnosis :. ED / Unable to sustain.

Erectile dysfunction was one of the most common problems amongst men but most of them would be in their middle age when they face it. It's rare to find this condition among young people such as this person.

Jensen nodded his head and put the file down on the desk just as there's a knock on the door as the knob turned.

Jensen looked up to find a very tall, slim and a very attractive white guy in a dark blue blazer, open the door and walk in. The guy took only a few steps and falter as if he was considering for a sec, then took a deep breath and walked up to his desk. He hesitated as though he's waiting for Jensen's permission to sit down.

"Please have a seat," said Jensen and he slowly pulled the chair out and sat in it. "Good evening, doctor," he said hesitantly.

"Yes, Mr. Padalecki, how can I be of help to you today?"

As the guy was sitting right across from him now, Jensen could see that the the man was very handsome and had extremely gorgeous features. His long, straight, silky hair almost reached his shoulders, his eyes looked dark one second and lighter when they met light. He had angular features, a pointy nose and the pinkest lips Jensen had ever seen.

He noticed how the young man seemed anxious as he kept drumming his fingers on the table. And then he spoke. "Umm.. I had been to a doctor previously and I might need an expert opinion from you." He had a beautiful tilting voice that went well with his appearance.

"Okay," drawled Jensen as he took the file once again and opened it for Jared's benefit. "It says that you already consulted Dr. David Schultz? So what did he say?"

"He thought my blood work and hormone levels are excellent. But then I have trouble while..." He let the words trail. "Since Dr. Schulz couldn't find any problem with the preliminary tests, he suggested that I go to an Andrologist. Also I'm sort of running short of time. I didn't want to go for any treatment because I thought it was a phase but my fiance insisted that I get the treatment done quick. So that's the reason I had to come for an emergency consultation. Uhm.. do you think I can get the treatment as soon as possible?"

"We can try. I have to go through your reports to see if I have everything I need. You might need to have additional tests done to ascertain the real cause. And a counselling session to see if it's psychosomatic by nature. These things can take time. It also differs from person to person so there's never a proper time range to suggest. Is there a reason for you and fiance to hurry this thing?"

"Yes. My fiance and I are getting married in two months. The date has been set. So I'm on a time limit here."

Jensen was truly surprised. Jared looked awfully young to get married. He's just 24. What's the hurry? Well, it's none of his business and why should he care? 

He looked down at the report once again and checked the blood work done only a week prior. The diagnostic lab is a popular one that his clinic often used, so he didn't need to get another one done right now. Next, he checked the testosterone level on the report and noted that it's optimum for a man Jared's age. Jensen looked up absently at Jared before going back deep into checking the other details. 

As Jensen was busy checking his file, Jared let himself relax a bit and took a better look at his doctor. He found Jensen's recommendation through one of his colleagues who was treated by Jensen before, and he swore the doctor was good. In fact, he was so impressed, he dedicated his improved sex life solely to Jensen and his knowledge on the subject. 

Jared had collected enough information about the doctor but he hadn't known that Dr. Ackles was such an extraordinarily handsome young man. He had seen the picture of an older man named Ackles in the article. But he was now sure that the man had retired and Jensen must be his son or heir or something. 

When he entered Jensen's office a few minutes ago, he deliberated for a second whether to turn back and leave because he didn't expect the doctor to be a hunk. He suspected that Jensen couldn't be a year older than thirty and that too, he was being too generous considering Jensen's extended qualifications. 

None of this should bother him as long as the doctor was good at his job but Jared couldn't help feeling conscious in Jensen's presence. His problem with his dick was a bit complex and he would have liked to have examined by a much older and well experienced doctor. But to have this handsome hunk to have a look at his genitals is gonna be..... Oh no, no, no. This was the last thing he wanted right now; Jared swallowed painfully. 

As Jensen was still leafing through the report, he surreptitiously studied Dr. Ackles' exquisite profile & noticed that he had an abundance of freckles all over his nose and cheeks. Until now Jared had never particularly liked freckles but they looked amazing on Dr. Ackles. And when Jensen looked up, oh god, he had the greenest of eyes behind a stylish pair of spectacles that sat on his pert nose. 

Jensen placed the file on the table and sighed. Nothing seemed out of normal. In Jensen's experience, that meant it's a bit complicated because it's not a cut and dried case. This needed counselling and validation done to ascertain the cause and that could take time. Plus, it required a few more invasive physical check ups which he hoped Jared would be aware of.

He glanced up at Jared and found that the man was staring at him. Something about his expression made Jensen conscious that he shifted his gaze and looked away. 

"Everything looks normal so far but I want a repeat of that testosterone done, Mr Padalecki. And one for diabetes too. Cuz, there may be certain invasive physical checks I need to carry on you and I need to follow protocol. After your report comes back, I'll have you scheduled for a physical examination. It may take a day or two at the max. In the meantime I'm going to teach you simple ways by which you can try and relax while having sex with your fiance. And I can't stress how much your fiance's understanding and cooperation is required while doing that. There shouldn't be any pressure on you and you should simply enjoy yourself without having any overt expectations."

"Okay," said Jared. His voice was almost a whisper and Jensen noticed that Jared was back to being restless as he was fidgeting back and forth in his chair. 

Jensen decided to ignore that as he continued to ask the usual questions.  
Was he a smoker?  
Did he have any other underlying medical conditions like diabetes, high BP or heart conditions and such?  
Jared kept shaking his head to all the questions implying he didn't have any of them. "As far as I know, I'm fit as a fiddle. That is, until this came up.." he trailed.

"Okay," continued Jensen. "The following questions may be a bit personal but they're important for the case. Can you tell me how often you masturbate?"

"Umm," Jared answered a bit flustered, "As often as necessary, I suppose?" 

"And that is?"

"Er.. once day or once in two days?" Jared seemed reluctant to answer the questions that prompted Jensen to look up at Jared curiously. "I would prefer if you be more forward with your answers, Mr. Padalecki. These will help me understand your condition better and would save time, so if you could try to be more precise, I'll really appreciate it."

"Alright, once a day."

"Okay, that's better," said Jensen as he prodded further. 

"So when you masturbate, how are your erections? Good or not enough?"

"Mostly good I suppose," said Jared sheepishly.

"I see. Do you watch porn, Mr. Padalecki?

Jared visibly blushed at this as he stammered, "Uh.. yes.. I suppose."

"How often?"

"Occasionally.. like once a week."

"So, how are your erections during these times? Do you get easily excited or do you have trouble getting erections then?" Jensen glanced up again with his pen poised on the notepad as he kept checking off the boxes on what looked like a questionnaire.

Jared visibly swallowed before he replied, "They are mostly fine."

"Hmm. So you have good erections during masturbation and while watching porn. Is that right, Mr. Padalecki? 

"I suppose," said Jared though he looked like a child who had been cornered. 

"So I guess this problem that you face is mostly confined to your fiance?" Jensen felt that Jared was keeping something away from him but he couldn't exactly figure out what. Jared looked visibly disturbed but these questions are important to gauge the problem and prescribe solution. So he kept at it.

"How attracted are you towards your fiancé, Mr. Padalecki?"

Jared blanched and Jensen reached to him immediately by making himself clear. "I'm not implying you're not. I'm just saying that your habit of masturbation and porn viewing can be affecting the attraction that you feel towards your fiancé."

"I understand why you're saying this. My fiance's reasonably good looking and attractive. But I don't understand why this is happening. In a way I masturbate or watch porn because nothing happens during the time I'm with her."

Jensen felt the questions were enough for their first consultation. He had some more specific questions to ask about their relationship but those can wait. He wanted to see the reports and do a physical check up before going any further.

"Okay, I think I got whatever I needed for now, so I'll schedule our next appointment soon after the reports come in. Please go to the diagnostic lab at room number 5 to give a blood sample and then leave your contact details at the reception so that we can notify you about the date and time of your next appointment," said Jensen as he handed over Jared a slip containing the details.

"Okay, will do. And thanks for squeezing me into your busy schedule, doc. I really appreciate that." Jared got up from his chair and came around the desk to shake Jensen's hand.

As Jensen got up from his chair to take his hand, he noticed that Jared was towering above him by a few inches, all lanky and beautifully gorgeous. Clad in a deep v-neck powder blue t-shirt, a dark navy blazer suit and matching pant, he looked as though he walked out of a ramp walk catalogue. Jared smiled as he shook his hand and Jensen could see two exquisite, deep swirls of dimples make their appearance, adding tremendously to Jared's beauty. 

Jared's mind was jumbled right now. Jensen's deep musk hit his nostrils as he bent to shake Jensen's hand. Jensen was all macho with a gorgeous face and the most magnificent body that looked well sculpted and strong under the fitting, crisp, white shirt. Jensen had the greenest emerald eyes set under very thick lashes and they did a complete sweep on Jared's body before coming to settle back on his eyes. Jared felt his breath catch in his throat. Jensen's strong grip caught him off guard and the point of contact felt electric on his skin. Jared withdrew his hand from Jensen's as quickly as he could. 

"Okay doc, see ya, bye," he simply said and proceeded to walk to the door without looking back. As he turned to close the door behind him, his eyes compulsively looked up and met Jensen's, as Jensen was still standing behind his desk, his eyes sincerely studying Jared.

\--------------------------------

"So, how did it go?" Gen hugged Jared before he took his place opposite her in the dining table. He drove straight from the clinic to Gen's house as was previously planned. 

"It went well I guess," replied Jared. "The doctor noted down some details and ordered some tests. I'll know more in the next visit that'll be scheduled in a few days." Jared spoke in a rather reflective mood as he wasn't sure if he was doing the right thing. 

He didn't want to go to a doctor for his problem. He was apprehensive from the beginning. It was Gen who pressured him to meet one since she was concerned about the lack of heat in their relationship. Even now, as he was talking about it, he couldn't help feel a sense of dread fill his mind. He was extremely anxious about the whole thing.

"See, I told you it's a step towards the right direction," Gen said without having a clue of what was going on in Jared's mind. "I hope the doctor could finish the treatment before the wedding. My parents have booked us at the Westlands honeymoon suite in Paris, and I want you to be in your best mood by then, if you know what I mean," she winked.

Of course, Jared understood what she meant and he couldn't help feel a wave of anxiety engulf him. "God! Please cure me of my condition," he pleaded silently to whoever was listening above him. "I just want a normal sex life. Is that too much to ask?" 

He looked across at Gen and felt a jab of guilt pierce through his heart. He looked back aimlessly into his pasta, his mind doing mental acrobatics as he considered his situation. He doubted if Gen would be as supportive if she knew what was actually going on with him. Jared sort of knew that it wasn't merely an erectile dysfunction that he was dealing with. He had a secret that he didn't even want the doctor to find out about.

To be continued.......

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


	2. Chapter 2

Jared was sitting at his desk, his eyes focused on the running script on his computer screen. He was at work on his 7th floor office, in his fancy multinational company’s headquarters, a sprawling 5 acre building campus, built with gleaming steel and glass.

He was totally engrossed in the latest project that he was heading with his group of fellow engineers. He was recently promoted to head a project and if he could nail this, it could lead him to more opportunities. He had his eyes set on the coveted Project Manager position that was due to become available to aspiring engineers in the company like him and he was not going to miss it for any reason.

The extension on his phone rang and he absently picked the receiver and placed it over his ear. “Yeah?”

“Mr. Padalecki, there’s someone here by the name Genevieve come to see you,” said the receptionist from the front desk. “Should I ask her to wait?”

What? He looked into his watch and immediately cursed. He was due to meet his parents at their house along with Gen for dinner. He completely let himself get absorbed with work and forgot the time. It was close to 6 in the evening. He closed the laptop and collected his things. Waving a quick goodbye to his team mates, he rushed to the reception area.

Gen was sitting on the sofa leafing through some magazine and looked up as he emerged from the enclosed area. She immediately smiled and looked at her watch. “Well, well. Look who’s forgotten about their date again.”

“It’s not a date,” muttered Jared under his breath as he hugged gen and kissed her cheek.

“C’mon lets go.” He took her by hand as he led her towards the main door and they both exited the building to go to his parents’ house.

“Hi Jared, hi Gen!” said Mr and Mrs Padalecki in chorus.

“Welcome home once again!” cooed Sharon.

Jared and Gen entered Jared’s parents’ house and were immediately inundated by two fully grown German shephards Harley and Koda. The dogs went berserk seeing Jared. Jared gave them lot of petting and belly rubs before getting up and hugging his parents.

He looked around the house and immediately felt nostalgic. He’d been completely occupied with work of late that it’d been months since he had visited his parent’s house. Well, it’s not a house, it was more like a sprawling mansion on the better part of Austin where the rich lived. Jared’s parents were well off, with Jared’s dad being the CEO of a business conglomerate. He’d been in the business for many years and he wanted Jared to follow in his footsteps. But Jared had other plans as he wanted to be independent and come up in life on his own. He was good in math from a small age and he had a knack for software development. After finishing his college in Dallas, he tried for a job in his hometown and immediately got one as he had passed his engineering degree with full honors. He’d been working for the past 2 years in his multinational company and because of his hard work and dedication, he was already in the run for the post of project manager.

“Come in, come in.” Jared’s dad led the way from the foyer to the living room talking all the way. Jared entered the living area and immediately stood frozen. There were another elderly couple already sitting on the sofa sipping drinks.

Gen’s parents.

“Oh hello Mrs. and Mr. Cortez, how are you?” He asked as he went to hug them both, wondering what the hell they were doing there. Today was supposed to be just his parents and him and of course Gen. But the evening had just taken a turn for the worst. He could already feel his reserves give way to exhaustion as he could anticipate a dreary evening ahead.

Gen laughed as she went to hug her parents. “I told them to come and join us as they were eager to meet their old friends,” she said mixing a drink for herself. After all what’s an evening if both our parents can’t join us, right?” Gen asked tweaking an eyebrow and Jared smiled sorely. “Oh yes, Jared, we couldn’t wait to meet you. How long has it been? Two months?” asked Gen’s father Peter. “Yes, and I couldn’t wait to meet my old friend Sharon,” joined Gen’s mother, Camille. “Mom, you meet Mrs. Cortez every week for dinner,” Gen joked while Jared mentally rolled his eyes.

He didn’t enjoy being with Gen’s parents as much. Gen’s father was a very adamant person and tried to dominate every conversation and her mom was extremely critical of everything. Plus, they were very conservative and judgmental in their perspective and that bothered Jared a lot. Jared’s parents were quite forward in their approach to life but their opinions were shot down every time by Gen’s parents. Jared had tried to side with his parents initially, but as time went, he gave up. Jared’s parents liked mingling with them as Peter was also Gerald’s business associate and it didn’t help that the four of them had been friends from high school.

Jared almost grew up together with Gen his whole life and they were best friends until high school. Their love only blossomed once Jared was in his sophomore year when Gen expressed her love for him. They were watching a movie together as usual in his bedroom and all of a sudden, Gen turned around and told him that she had something important to confide. He looked at her and the next moment, she was kissing him. Gen was only a few months younger to him and Jared never saw her in that light. But he was overwhelmed at the moment and didn’t know how to react. One moment they were kissing and the next she was announcing to her parents that she and him were dating. Jared had a brother Jeff and a sister Meg. Soon everyone was celebrating and congratulating them. Gen was the only daughter to her parents and she was the apple of their eyes. Her parents were ecstatic that she chose well. Jared’s parents believed that settling in matrimony early on was important. Meg was only 22 and she was already engaged to her longtime boyfriend. Jeff wasn’t dating anyone then and was finishing college, so he was given 2 more years to find a suitable girl and settle down. It was a whirlwind from there and Jared and Gen started to date with the blessings of their parents.

“Jared, are you even in this world?” Sharon’s voice brought him back to reality and Jared jumped.

“Oh yeah, ma! I’m alright. Just a wee bit distracted with the project that am doing currently.” Jared could lie easily. And to be honest, lying is what he’s been doing of late.

He sighed as his father slipped the drink in to his hand. “Don’t worry Jared, you would loosen up once the alcohol relaxes you. C’mon, let’s go to the garden where we have arranged the dinner to take place,” his father led Jared out to the backyard where the table was set with a wide array of foods and beverages. There was a butler waiting to serve them and take their drink orders.

As Jared feared, the whole evening went about in chatting about unsavory topics and Jared couldn’t kick himself up harder for not inviting Jeff and Meg along. But Jeff was away in San Antonio with his new job and Meg along with her husband went on a movie night. Jared quietly cursed under his breath. His jaws ached from smiling for too long when all he felt was the total opposite of it.

When it became 10 pm, they showed signs of wrapping dinner and he couldn’t wait to get back to his own house, the recent one that he bought putting his own money as deposit. His house wasn’t as big but it had all the comforts he craved. He had total privacy not to mention lots of peace and quiet. But, that’s going to be short lived as after his marriage, Gen would come to live with him there. So for the time being, every day that he got to live alone in his bachelor pad, was precious.

As he got up to stretch, Sharon threw the bomb that Gen’s parents were staying the night and so should Jared and Gen. Jared blanched while Gen became jubilant and jumped up. “Yay. That’s great Mrs. Padalecki. It’s been a long time since we all stayed in your residence. Thanks a lot.” She ran to Sharon and hugged her tight.

Jared tried to take his mom aside later just to confront her, “Ma, I wished you had asked me first. Why would you ask them to stay here?”

“What do you mean why? We decided to go for an early game of tennis tomorrow and decided to go together from here. Didn’t Gen tell you? She was the one who arranged it.”

Jared sighed. Sometimes he could only roll his eyes at Gen because he felt that he and she were cut out from different fabrics. There wasn’t one thing where they met eye to eye.  
Sometimes Gen made these arrangements and informed him at the last moment so that he couldn’t cancel.

Jared relented finally. “Okay, do what you want. But why did you ask us both to stay with you? I got some more office work to do on my laptop. You are putting a spanner in my work ma!”

No one is going to disturb you Jared. Your study room is still clean and usable. Why don’t you finish your pending work there?” Sharon looked quizzically at Jared as she pondered, “You are getting married to that girl in two months. You know that right? Sometimes you act like you don’t even know her.”

Jared fell silent at his mom’s last sentence. That's true. He was 24, and getting married in 2 months. But he had the interest and of a monk when it came to romance and sex. And those were his parents-in-law. He needed to get used to them for the rest of his life. Jared once again could feel his excitement wane at the thought of that as he left to rest in his bedroom.

Gen was sitting on her side of the bed applying lotion on her hands when Jared entered his bedroom. He stood silent for a moment.

“They let us sleep together in the same bedroom?” he asked confused.

Gen laughed out loud. “Of course. C’mon Jared. We are engaged. What’s the harm in that? Sometimes I think your parents think more forward than you, you are such a grandpa,” she said smiling.

Jared didn’t say anything. He went to the bathroom taking his night change of clothes. When he emerged after 15 minutes, he found Gen fast asleep.

He watched her a few seconds, pondering, before taking his laptop and going to his study, adjacent to the bedroom. It was a small cubicle with a workstation that he used whenever he came over to his parents’ house. He settled the laptop on top of the desk top and closed the door, locking it.

He sat comfortably in his swivel chair and opened his laptop. He put in his fingerprint and double authentication codes to open some folders, stored in the deep recess of his files. He sat back in his chair and looked into the computer screen as the sensual voices started to rise and fill up the air.

Jared went to to breathe deeply as he opened his fly and take his cock out. He was already half hard and as he watched the scenes filling the full screen, he started to stroke himself moaning somewhat.

He glared at the two gorgeous people having intense sex in the porn and felt his pulse quicken.

They were both…… boys.

The guy on the screen had an impressive appearance. He was tall, lean and muscular, he had dark brown blonde hair and hazel eyes. His cock was an impressive 9 inches and he was pushing himself into his lover’s hole with deep grunts.  
The person on the other side, receiving his forceful thrusts was a beautiful tall, lanky and a pretty boy.  
He was shrieking and screaming and taking the thrusts with gusto, pushing his arse up against his lover. They both were hugging and kissing each other and Jared could go no longer.

As he started to come, he closed his eyes and tried to imagine Gen’s face like he always did.

But try as he might, his mind involuntarily jumped to the hunky doctor he met two days ago, his emerald green eyes filling his mind’s eye.  
With the memories of doc’s delicious musky smell and his impressive body his mind brought back, Jared came and came and came, with an earth shattering orgasm, shuddering heavily and holding on to the chair for support.

When he entered his bedroom once again, he found Gen sitting up on the bed, looking groggy and irritated. Jared got a real scare and jumped back.

“Oh god, Gen! You scared me. What are you doing sitting up like that in the middle of the night?”

“I’m scaring you? Where were you and where are you coming from?” Gen asked him incredulously.

“Um, had to finish some pending work from office.” He lied without looking her in the eye as he put his laptop in to his bag and securing it.

“Guess I dozed off,” said Gen pointing at his side table. “Your phone woke me up. It’s been pinging for the past several minutes.”

Just as Jared took a look at his phone, it pinged again. He picked it up while looking at the clock. It was half past eleven. Who could be messaging him at this hour? He wondered. He unlocked it and looked in to see 15 unread messages, all from Chad.

“It’s chad,” he said aloud.

He opened up the messages to read and his face kept going from confusion to one of excitement. At the end of the messages, he yelled happily. “Chad says he’s going to be here in two days.”

“What?” Gen perked up and asked in shock.

“Yeah. Today’s Friday, which means he’s going to be here on Sunday.”

“And how long is he gonna stay?”

“He’s coming here for good. He’s got a new job at Alistair and it seems he’s going to look for a house in Austin to stay.” Jared said in a daze.

“Yay! Gen bounced up and down on her knees on the bed in real jubilance. I can’t believe he’s going to come for good, Jared. Imagine the three of us like old times, Eeeee!”

Jared enjoyed Gen’s euphoria and in truth, he couldn’t contain his own joy knowing that the missing part of the trinity is going to be back. Chad, Jared and Gen studied and grew up together. They were in the same school, same neighborhood and their fathers worked for the same company. In fact, Gen was closer with Chad than him. That’s why their friends were surprised when they heard that Gen chose Jared over Chad.

So, when Chad went away for university in Houston and stayed there afterwards for his job, Jared and Gen felt like a whole part of their lives went missing. So yeah, he’s happy that Chad was coming back. Just that thought of having his very close friend with him made him feel stronger and exuberant, something he wasn’t feeling for so long.

Jared and Gen chit chatted the next few minutes bringing back old memories as Gen drifted off to sleep reminiscing.

Jared was about to fall asleep when he noticed that there was just one more unread message left on his phone.

He looked at it and the name read, ACKLES SEX WELLNESS CLINIC.

Immediately Jared’s heart rate went up as he grappled with the phone and clicked it open.

It read: Your test results are in. You are requested to come in tomorrow for your appointment at 12 pm. Please call us if you want to reschedule your appointment.

Jared stared at the message with a beating heart as the sleep had momentarily vanished from his eyes. He did not know whether he had to go at all. How can he explain his condition to the doctor without him laughing in his face? Jared fell heavily on his pillow with a loud sigh and drifted off thinking about various excuses he can use to cancel the appointment.

_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

To be CONTINUED.... :)


	3. Chapter 3

Jared woke up with sunlight streaming in through the open drapes, hitting him in the face.

“Mhhhm.” He sat up trying to ascertain where he was. Memories of the previous night came flooding back and he quickly checked the clock to find it was almost eight o’ clock and rushed to the bathroom to freshen up. He still hadn’t made up his mind about cancelling the appointment he had at the sex clinic. On the one hand, he didn’t want go and never to answer any future calls from them. On the other, he wanted to collect the reports so that he can maybe use them for future reference.

His mind was in a jumble that only when he came out after an hour of a thorough shower did he wonder where Gen went. Neither did he hear any sound from the downstairs from anyone else. He quickly climbed down the steps, two at once and reached the dining area to find his food kept there under covered wraps. There was a note from Gen saying that she was accompanying the others to the tennis court and telling him not to wait for her.

He kept looking the note as he absently took a bite of his sandwich, his mind deep in thought. After tennis, it was customary for the Padaleckis to visit the Cortezes’ house for brunch. Therefore, as per tradition, Gen would be with them most of the day.

He had the whole day off and he couldn’t wait to get back to his own house. He quickly took a few bites of the sandwich, threw the rest in to the waste bin, and locked the house. He left the key under the designer rock his mom had specifically made for the purpose and left the house.

As he reached the garage, he realized that Gen had taken his car with her. He silently cursed as he walked until the end of the cross section to flag a taxi for his ride home.

When he reached home after half an hour, he settled down comfortably in front of the TV and had a cup of coffee, watching news and sports.

His eyes automatically went to his watch to check the time and it was 11.10. Jared cursed under his breath. What was he thinking? He should have called and cancelled the appointment.

He was already dreading getting married at 24, to a girl who he saw more as a friend, getting himself an overbearing set of parents-in-law who judge his every move, on top of the pressures from his job. He totally didn’t need this head ache right now.

He silently mulled the consequences of him visiting the clinic. If he could be elusive and get away with the counselling, he would be fine. And after this time, he would tell Gen that all was fine and he didn’t have to go to the doctor anymore. He had the old blood reports to confirm that everything was right. And then, he would tell the clinic to cancel all his future appointments with them.

With that crucial decision made in his head, Jared immediately started to feel better. “Lemme get this over with,” he thought to himself as he hurried and went in to change his clothes. He threw the first thing he could find in his closet and hurried down the road to find a cab.

He climbed down from the cab at the foot of the clinic building at 11.45. He paid the taxi fare and took the elevator to the 2nd floor of the clinic to the doctor’s office. As he entered the familiar surrounding for a second time, his pulse picked up and his heart started to beat faster. Memories of his last visit filled him with dread and he told a quick prayer. “God! Please help me. Let me be normal, get married and lead a happy life. Whatever this is, help me overcome, please!”

The same receptionist he met last time was sitting at the reception desk and she threw a dazzling smile upon seeing Jared. “Welcome Mr. Padalecki! The doctor has been waiting for you as you are the only appointment for the day.”

“I’m the only one? Jared looked around and noticed that there indeed wasn’t any soul there except him and the girl. He turned to her and asked her “May I know why I’m the only one here today?”

“We didn’t have any patients scheduled for today but Dr. Ackles insisted that he sees you today.” She smiled brightly, exposing a perfect set of white teeth and collected her purse and got ready to go somewhere. “So, I came here just to ring you in; if you’ll excuse me Mr. Padalecki, I have to leave now. I need to go to attend my son’s basketball tournament. I hope you can see yourself out after you finish your session and I hope you have nice day!”

Bemused, Jared watched her go and for a moment, he stood undecided. Should he leave? He was already on edge and the woman leaving him alone in the big clinic at the mercy of the doctor made him unsure of himself.

Dazed, he walked further up the corridor until he found the office on the right and knocked. “Come in,” said the mannish voice and he felt himself starting to feel the familiar stirrings in the pit of his stomach.

As he entered, Dr. Ackles got up from his seat and came in front to welcome him and Jared felt like a bulldozer hit him.

The doctor looked far more impressive than he remembered him from last time. He was wearing a powder blue shirt and a dark blue striped tie with a pinstriped suit in glorious royal blue. His hair was held in an upsweep by gel that made his brown hair look slick with the tips like needles, adding rather a boyish charm to his already handsome face.  
Instead of the pair of spectacles that he wore the other day, today he wore thick dark aviator shades and Jared, for a moment, felt like he was in a time lapse. He couldn’t move, he couldn’t take his eyes away from the magnificent creature in from of him as he watched him, fascinated.

Yeah, nothing weird about doctors being attractive, but Dr. Ackles can take the cake along with the cherry in that department. Moreover, what’s with the suit? Was it even allowed for doctors to be dressed like that inside clinics?

“Mr. Padalecki, thanks for coming at such short notice. Sorry, I came in just now and if you won’t mind, I’ll be back just in a minute,” he said as he entered the attached bathroom. Jared exhaled visibly as he went to take his seat opposite the doctor’s, against the desk.

When Jensen came out of the bathroom after a few minutes, he saw Jared sitting on his chair but he was busy inspecting the photo frames placed on the desk. As he saw Jensen enter, he quickly placed them back, albeit clumsily on the desk and stood up.

“It’s okay, please sit,” said Jensen as he approached the table. I’m sorry, I was just back from a doctor’s conference that took place in the morning, hence I’m not in my doctor’s clothes, hope you don’t mind,” he said as he removed his aviator pair of glasses and placed them casually on the table. His green eyes were back on display and Jared’s breath hitched in his throat.

Jensen smiled as he shook hands with Jared before taking his seat behind the desk, while surreptitiously running his eyes on the entire length of Jared.  
Jared was wearing a short, half sleeved, cream colored, linen V-necked t-shirt and when he lifted his hand to shake his, the t-shirt rode up to reveal a sliver of his slim waist. He wore acid-washed faded blue jeans to go with it and once again Jensen couldn’t help feel that Jared should be a ramp-walk model instead of an engineer. Or he must belong to that rare breed of beauty with brains, which made it even better.

Once they were settled, Jensen picked Jared’s file from the desk and opened it. “Okay, shall we begin, Mr. Padalecki?” he said looking straight at Jared’s impassive face. “Yes of course,” Jared said and smiled at the doctor, while on the inside, he was crumbling like a pack of cards.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Gen was sitting at the dining table with her mom and was munching on the apples that her mom had just cut for her. Jared’s parents had just left and she stayed back with her mom to clean up. Gen stayed at her friend Jermaine’s apartment with whom she shared her clothes designing business. She visited her parents on the weekends.

Now, since her dad left to have his afternoon siesta following the brunch, Gen found the time to bond with her mother with whom she shared a close connection.

“So what’s up with Jared?” Asked Gen’s mother taking a bite of the cut apple slice.

“What about him?” Repeated Gen, cocking her eyebrow.

Camille lowered her gaze and stared at her apple for a few seconds before speaking. “Sorry Gen, but surely I’m not the only one picking clues from how he seems to be with you?”

“What do you mean, mother?” Asked Gen.

“He seems not to be least interested in you. I’ve always had this feeling when he was with you even before your engagement but since you are engaged now, its bothering me even more,” admitted Camille.

“Mom, I think you are over reacting. Jared is…has always been like that you know. He’s sort of a nerd. He would be more interested in browsing his laptop and watching news on TV rather have a session in the sack,” Gen commented casually, spitting the apple pits on to her palm.

Camille looked at Gen sharply as she asked, “And that doesn’t bother you? Gen. I and your dad are pushing 50 but we still have it at least twice every month. You both are just starting out. why doesn’t that worry you?”

“Eww, mom that’s too much information,” Gen pretended to gag but she has never minded discussing these topics with her mom openly. “Okay look, I agree that we are currently undergoing some problems in the bedroom but they’re nothing some therapy and mood enhancers can’t fix. We’ll ride it out, mom, you stop worrying.”

“Problems in bed? Like what?” Camille asked in surprise.

“Hmm, like he has trouble maintaining his stature, you know. And most of the times, he acts like he’s asexual.” Gen screwed her face in mock thinking and added, “And I’m starting to think he might as well be one.”

“What? And you are telling me this, NOW?” Camille asked in bewilderment. “Why did you think this was a small matter to sweep under the carpet, Gen? I would understand if you were 40 and married with kids, but this, is not right.”

“Ok mom, stop worrying so much,” said Gen exasperated. “Look, first of all, I’m not that much into sex either. I like it, but there are other things in a marriage that are important to me, okay?”

“Like what?”

“Like, a good family. A good business, a good house, a good car… lots of things like that.” She said and looked up at her mom to see that her mom looked horrified by what she just heard.  
She swallowed hard and put the uneaten apple piece back on the plate. She pursed her lips into a thin line and sighed, “Okay, for me, it was always his family. I would love Jared’s parents as my in-laws and I’d love to be their daughter in law. Gerald runs the garment manufacturing company and I think I want to be a part of it, contributing to it. Mom, you got to understand how important this is to me. That’s the reason I proposed to Jared. I thought about it and planned ahead. I practically grew up in their house. And I can’t imagine a future where I could marry another person and let go off all this. You know how I’m struggling to let ends meet with my business right now. With Jared, I think my future would be set. I hope you understand what I mean,” she looked at her mom from under her lashes, almost waiting to be reprimanded.

Camille sighed. “Hmm, I knew there was a reason for you to be with Jared because from the beginning I couldn’t see the chemistry between you two. Okay Gen, if that’s what you want, I’ll be okay with it. And of course, I agree that the Padaleckis are rich and established and I would always be happy for you to be a part of that family. In that regard, I’d say well done.”

“Thanks mom, I knew you would understand.” Gen went around to hug her mom.

“Wait, I haven’t finished yet. Still, I don’t think the way Jared treats you is justified. If anything I’ll get to the bottom of this and find ways to improve this situation. You should let me do this, will you?”

Gen screwed her eyebrows while thinking about it. She knew that Jared would lose his mind if he knew that she discussed their issues with her mom and that Camille was on his case now.

She shook her head. “Maybe you do something about this without his knowledge, but if he comes to know, he’d be cross. He already seems to have got cold feet because of the marriage plans and I don’t want to chase him away. So whatever you do, don’t let him know but keep me in the loop.”

“Don’t worry Gen dear, I’ll be very discreet, you’ll see,” her mom said smiling.

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Jensen was looking into the report, leafing though, tracing the rows with his fingers, while Jared’s eyes, once again went to the photo frames set on the table. It was a picture of Jensen with a cute little blonde girl and a beautiful woman. The wording on the photo read, “My angel Noel and sweet Daneel.”

'That must be his wife and daughter! He has a beautiful family,' Jared mused.

There was a stab of jealousy that ran through him and he didn’t know what he was feeling jealous for. May be because Jensen was normal enough to have his own family, just the way the society wanted from men. He can satisfy a woman in bed and have a kid with her and fill cute picture frames with them.

He looked at the woman closely and he found that her possessive hand on Jensen made him feel somewhat. He didn’t want to think that the feeling was jealousy again, but he was at a loss to realize that, it indeed was jealousy but it was not directed towards Jensen. He felt insanely jealous that the woman owned Dr. Ackles. Jensen was married to that woman which made Jared cower in shame that he used his image in his mind to masturbate the previous night. ‘How stupid and utterly deplorable of me,’ he thought.

He was so deep in his thought that he didn’t realize that Jensen had finished going through his report and was looking at him. He glanced up to meet Jensen’s searching eyes and he immediately straightened up.

“Something interesting?” Jensen’s eyes followed Jared’s object of attention and he lifted an eyebrow in question.

“Uhm..” Jared stammered. “Nice family you have there,” he pointed to the picture and continued, “Your wife is beautiful and your daughter is adorable.”

“That’s not my wife.” Jensen answered, smiling.

Jared’s smile vanished from his face and immediately his heart started to hammer in his chest. “Oh…I thought..” he couldn’t think of anything.

“Jensen picked the picture in his hand as he caressed it gently. “That’s Noel, my 7 year old daughter and that woman Daneel, is her mother.”

Jared realized that he was staring at Jensen. “What does that mean? Are you divorced?” he asked.

“No. I’m not married. Daneel is my neighbor and was my childhood friend. She and her woman partner Meg, wanted to have a child, so I donated my sperm. Long story short, we share custody of Noel now.” Jensen didn’t know why he was sharing the intimate details of his life with an almost stranger like Jared but for some reason, he wanted Jared to know that he wasn’t married. He smiled at Jared as he watched Jared’s expression change from one of confusion to elation.

“Wow, that’s nice,” said Jared, his face automatically lighting up. He didn’t know why but he was very happy to know that Jensen wasn’t married. ‘Now I can feel less guilty about masturbating about him,’ he thought but he knew the real reason wasn’t just that. In spite of the situation he was in, it made him smile a little more knowing that Jensen was single.

“Okay, let’s get to your report now.” Jensen said, leaning back into his swivel chair. “Your reports are one hundred percent clean. Your blood work is excellent, you don’t have hypertension or diabetes. Your testosterone levels are normal too.”

Jared exhaled in relief. Thank god for small mercies.

Jensen continued, “Did you try and have sex with your fiancée like I suggested?”

Jared felt caught off-guard. He stammered, “I…yeah.. as a matter of fact, I did,” he lied.

“So what happened?”

“I still have the problem,” Jared said looking down at his hands. He didn’t want Jensen to know that he actively avoided Gen for the last few days.

“Hmm,” said Jensen. “At this juncture, we need to rule out any biological trouble that you might be having with your… uhm equipment. We need to do a few physical examinations to get them out of the way.”

Jared felt blood leaving his face as he blanched. “Physical examination? What physical examination?”

“I think I told you that we may have to do a few invasive physical checks to rule out if the nerves on the penis are working fine. I may have to check your prostate gland to ensure there are no abnormalities there too. Once we finish those, we can move on to the other causes.”

“You mean, I have to…?” Jared looked at his groin and looked up at Jensen in disbelief.

“Yes, I’m afraid, you have to,” Jensen said easily as he got up from his chair. “Why don’t you go inside the examination room, change into the hospital gown and make yourself comfortable while I’ll disinfect myself and be there in a minute?”

Jared got up slowly and walked to the examination room that was situated on the right side of the room. He had completely forgotten that Dr. Ackles had warned him of an impending physical examination. He just prayed that it wouldn’t be too extensive. He found the hospital gown on the examination table. It was a single piece of garment that covered one side whereas on the other side, there were only strings to tie at two places. He disrobed after closing the door behind him and wore the hospital gown. It looked too skimpy and he felt too exposed. Having nothing else to do, he climbed on the immaculate examination bed and lied down on his back, his heart hammering away in his chest.

TO BE CONTINUED....  
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	4. Chapter 4

As Jensen entered the room, he watched Jared get up from the examination bed and sit up as if to acknowledge his presence. Jensen’s immediate response was to laugh because Jared was wearing the gown the other way around. Instead of tying the strings at the back, he had tied them in the front, therefore having a hard time concealing his body from being gapingly exposed in between the knotted parts.

Jared was carefully holding the flaps from the garment at his waist to protect his modesty, but the garment fell open, exposing most of his upper body. Jensen stared in spite of himself as he was becoming aware of Jared’s near nakedness. Jared was looking extraordinarily gorgeous with the baby blue of the hospital gown bringing the hazel out in his eyes. Jared’s hair was slightly in disarray as they tumbled down in a beautiful mess of layers around his remarkable face and his impressive chest with the peaking nipples were on full display. Jensen’s breath hitched in his throat for he couldn’t remember the last time he had had such a magnificent looking patient in his care. He quickly cleared his thoughts as he approached the bed.

Jared looked like a deer caught in head lights. Jensen could sense that Jared was anxious for the ordeal and he immediately felt sorry for him. He wanted to get this done as fast as he could so that he can let Jared go, but at the same time, he didn’t want to rush it because he felt that Jared’s case needed more care and understanding. He didn’t have a doubt that Jared had any problem, because his blood and urine work were excellent. He hoped that he didn’t have any nerve problems in his penis or other prostrate troubles. They were more intensive tests if Jared failed these initial checks that might involve injecting him for a sonography but Jensen wished he didn’t have to go that far. But that’s one of the reasons he called him in today when there wouldn’t be any disturbance. So that he can give his time to Jared. 

“Okay Jared, let’s get this started, shall we?” he said as he removed his coat and hung it on one of the pegs behind the closed door. He loosened his tie so that he could be more at ease. As he did that, he saw Jared was sitting there, staring at his body. His eyes travelled up and down, then he quickly swallowed and looked away.

Jensen pulled the trolley containing all the supplies necessary for the exam, to the foot of the bed and started to prepare himself by wearing the latex gloves, applying a little lube on his hands and smear it all over his fingers. 

“Jared, can you lie down back on the bed now. And I want you to fully relax. There is nothing to worry about, as these tests are only perfunctory and I believe you are perfectly alright. So, you can now ease yourself and let me do the work, alright?”

Jared nodded his head as he lied back on the bed, still holding the garment at his waist. He knew it was futile, as in a few moments Jensen would have to see his privates at close range, but he wanted to stall that for as long as could. He was having a crisis of sorts because he was sporting a semi-hard on just now as he watched Dr. Ackles remove his coat and expose his magnificent body clad only in that figure hugging shirt that did nothing to hide his impressive shape underneath. He chided himself and cursed silently. Of all the doctors to choose, he had to choose the most handsome doctor in the world. What are the odds? Now all he could do is pray that he would pass the tests without doing anything that would embarrass him. 

He lied down, resting his head on the soft pillow and looked up at Jensen standing at the foot of the bed, wearing his gloves. He closed his eyes and tried to picture something turning off so that he would lose his hard on in time. And he frantically started to try from the different images in his mind. His fights with fellow classmates from school….The argument he had with his superior, the other day…. The last time he tried having sex with Gen….Bingo. His hard on finally started to show signs of leaving and Jared sighed a breath of relief. At the same time, he was mortified to think that having sex with his fiancé should do the trick and make him lose his hard on. Oh God, what a mess he was!

“Okay, now, here we go,” said Jensen as he approached Jared and opened the garment at his groin level. He halted momentarily, admiring the most magnificent cock and balls that he had ever seen in his life. Jared was pink and cut and the hair around was neatly trimmed. Not completely shaven but only leaving a slight drizzle of stubble, just the way Jensen liked it. He was of an impressive size, being almost 5 inches even when soft and Jensen could only imagine how big he would be at full mast. He felt sorry for his fiancé, instantly. It can’t be much of a fun for her having the most good looking boyfriend with the most gorgeous dick but unable to use it for the purpose.

His eyes automatically went to Jared’s face but Jared was lying there with his eyes closed, trying to breathe normally. Jensen stared at his serene countenance with his beautiful lock of hair forming a halo around his delectable face and he was mesmerized by the view. In spite of his professional stance with which he tried to look at Jared until now, he couldn’t help getting a little turned on by him. He knew thinking such thoughts wasn’t very professional of him but hey, he’s human after all. And Jared was extraordinarily gorgeous. In a way, he wished that Jared hadn’t come to him for medical advice, for it was becoming very hard to see him only as a patient. 

Dazed and trying to shake away the sinful thoughts that clouded his mind, Jensen reached to take Jared’s cock in his hand and start his usual examination. He heard a soft sound coming from Jared’s direction and it’s contrast to the pin drop silence in the room, almost made Jensen jump. Startled, he glanced at Jared, only to see that Jared was looking at him, trying to adjust himself in the bed, as if he wasn’t too comfortable.

“You okay there, Jared? Did you say something?”

“Uhm.. no. Just that I’m a little anxious today, that’s all.”

“That’s fine. Try and relax. If at any point, you experience discomfort or pain, please raise your hand and I would stop, okay Jared?”

Jared nodded. He was, at this point, giving up hope. He successfully made the hard on go away but by the time Jensen touched his cock, his mind skyrocketed. He wasn’t aware that he made a noise, only came to know when Jensen stopped and asked him what was up. God, it would be a miracle if he could get away with these tests without making a fool of himself, but unfortunately, he didn’t believe in miracles. 

As Jensen took Jared’s cock in his hand once again, he made sure there weren’t any lumps under the skin by running his fingers all around the length of the cock. Not even a second into that and he could sense Jared’s cock growing in his hands. He didn’t glance at Jared to make him feel uncomfortable because it was sometimes a common thing to occur to people who get excited at the touch of the cock. It didn’t necessarily mean that the person was liking the touch, it’s just a natural reaction from the penis because of the blood flow, irrespective of the person touching the cock. But in Jared’s case it might mean that the blood flow to his penis was normal which was a very good sign. 

Jensen transferred Jared’s cock to his left hand while he tried to examine his testicles with his right. He squeezed the nuts and felt them in his expert hands to see for abnormal lumps or cysts but as far as he could, there were none. He was going to progress to examine the head of the cock to ascertain an important part of the test involving the nerves. He had to press the head of the cock tightly and then observe the way the anal sphincter reacted to it. If the anal sphincter tightened proportionately to the squeeze then the test was a success. But before he could do that, Jensen had to stop and look at Jared’s cock in wonderment. It was not just that his cock had hardened considerably in his hand, it had grown really huge, to be ten inches at least. He felt a sharp movement from Jared and he glanced up at him to see what was going on but what he saw made his heart skip a beat.

Jared was breathing hard, his face flushed and beads of sweat forming on his forehead. He was looking at Jensen and then at his cock in Jensen’s hands and whimpered softly. 

For a moment Jensen stood undecided. It was as much as he could do to look away because Jared’s reaction was making him think that Jared was enjoying his touch, that it wasn’t merely an accident but Jared was liking it.

“Uhm.. Jared, is everything okay?’ he asked merely as an obligatory question because he didn’t know what else to say.

“Yeah…,” Jared managed to say, amidst his heavy breathing. “But… I…I would like it if you could hurry up because….I…don’t think, I can hold very well.” 

Jensen was hypnotized by how delicious Jared looked right then. Jared was pushing his head behind in to the pillow, exposing his long, beautiful, swan like neck and he lolled his head a bit making his luscious hair prance around his face. For a moment, Jensen wished they weren’t doctor and patient but instead met at a bar or something. Jensen would have fucked him all night. 

“Yeah…yeah sure,” Jensen assured him as he tried to get his brain to function and hurry up finishing the first test. “Can you put your legs up, bending your knees, so that I can see your anus?”

“What?” asked Jared, his breath caught in his throat. “Why would you want to see that?”

“It is important to determine if the nerves are working well. Now please Jared, if you comply with me, we can finish this sooner. Now will you co-operate with me?”

“Y..Yes,” replied Jared as he bent his legs, exposing his most vulnerable part of the body to the doctor’s inspecting eyes. 

Jensen held both of his legs and spread them so that he could have a good view of his ass. He spread the ass cheeks until he could see the puckered little pink hole. “Good, he said,” as he held the ass cheeks and spread them with his right gloved hand, while with his left hand, he held the head of the cock and squeezed it. The anal sphincter clenched in proportion with the squeeze and Jensen nodded his head in approval. He checked it a few times, just to be sure, by pressing the head, applying different pressures when it happened--

There was a grunt followed by a deep guttural noise that came from Jared’s direction and before Jensen could become aware of what was happening, Jared was coming, his cock squirting streams of white liquid all over Jensen’s hand and the front of his shirt.   
Jensen tried to let go of Jared’s cock and back away in astonishment but not before Jared had his moment, his body still clenching and twitching from the aftershocks of his orgasm. 

There were moments, when talking never helped the situation, and this was definitely one of them. 

Jensen peeked at Jared who looked spent, his head turned towards the pillow and away from Jensen. He was still breathing heavily though, as it looked like he was bringing himself under control. Jensen silently left to take a few tissue papers from the table and returned to the bed and start cleaning the mess. 

He dabbed his shirt with the tissue and wipe away the wetness of the semen that made his shirt cling to his skin at places. He wiped his hands dry and stole a look at Jared to see how he was doing.

Jared was looking devastated as he looked red in the face from what Jensen guessed was because of the exertion and embarrassment. He started to say something but he stammered, not able to finish what he came to say, “I’m so sorry doctor, I..”

Jensen put his hand up and stopped him from explaining any further. “Look, Jared. From my experience, this is not uncommon. Things like these happen when you have gone too long without a release. In your case, I would say it is a good sign as this proves that your ED is not biological. But I have one or few more tests to conduct when we have the chance, so can we continue now or do you want some time to recuperate?”

“May be give me five minutes, please?” Jared said, avoiding looking at Jensen and Jensen nodded his head in agreement. “Okay. I’ll come back after finishing some phone calls in the next room. You will have some time for yourself. In the meantime, if you need anything, just holler, okay?” Jensen smiled kindly as he turned on his heels and walked outside to his office.

Jared sat up on the bed as he stared at the doctor’s retreating figure and he put his head in his hands, sighing. What a nightmare this was. What happened was just what he wished wouldn’t happen. What’s with him anyway? He remembered he held himself back as the doctor started to touch his cock but as much as he restrained himself, he couldn’t after a point. He wasn’t exactly sure when things started to go awry and he came like a teenager coming for the first time. 

Jared tried to breathe normally as he couldn’t wait to get done with the rest of the tests. Well, the worst was over, wasn’t it, what more could happen that can outwit what he just did.   
Jared sighed with relief not knowing that the worse in his case was yet to come.

To be continued...


	5. Chapter 5

Jensen went straight to the rest room and shut the door behind him. He relaxed his shirt and removed the tie to hang it on the back of the door. He went to the wash basin and splashed his face and neck with cold water.

Jensen had been gay ever since he remembered but he kept it a secret from his family until his second year of college. When he decided that he was totally gay with no chance of ever going back to being bisexual, he came out to his parents and other family friends. He’d been on short term relationships and one-night stands ever since, however, he had never met anyone who made him get the urge to settle down.

But when he met Jared for the first time, it was like something came alive in him and he was completely taken aback by Jared’s beauty. He was delighted to see that Jared was the perfect mixture of brawn and brains and so young and beautiful just the way Jensen liked it. But then Jared was already engaged with a woman and going to be married in two months. Damn!  
But that didn’t deter Jensen from vowing that if he would ever settle down with a guy in the future, it would be with a person like Jared. Jared was just gorgeous and elegant and did he mention gorgeous? Gawd!

If Jensen had thought that Jared was gorgeous before, he was in for treat when he got to see him nearly without clothes. Jared was a babe, with his body, his face and gorgeous hair and a matching set of cock and balls to go with them. It was as much Jensen could do to keep his boner under control because, one, he was in a professional environment, and two, Jared was petrified like a child before the examination, and as his doctor, Jensen had the duty to take care of him. But damn… imagine his surprise when minutes later, Jared orgasmed in his hands. While it was common for men to become erect and ejaculate during a penis examination, it was a bit more rare for men with ED to do so. Which is why Jensen wanted to do more tests to ascertain the actual cause for his failure during sexual intercourse. Jensen threw the towel in the bin and hurried through the door to finish the rest of the pending tests.

******************************************************************************************************************************************

Jared looked up as the door opened and Jensen entered the examination room again. He didn’t know how many minutes had passed since Jensen left the room but it seemed like a lot. Jared felt ashamed at what had happened and felt shy to face Jensen again. But then, Jensen didn’t show any reaction as he went about preparing himself for further tests.

“Can you please lie on the bed so I can get the ultrasound machine fixed?” Jensen asked as he adjusted the bed so that Jared could lie down on a slightly inclined angle.

“Yeah,” Jared leaned himself against the bed and was careful not to let the garment part in the strategic place while doing so. Jensen had already seen him there naked but Jared felt shy and wanted to protect his modesty as much as he could. He settled himself in the bed and looked at what Jensen was doing. Jensen was still connecting the wires to the ultrasound machine that was lying by the far end wall and he pulled the machine close to be at par with Jared’s head.

Jared skewed his head to see the monitor but there was nothing going on except for some static. Jensen brought a revolving chair and placed it on level with Jared’s hip and he sat down. He punched in something on the keyboard, checking for things, while Jared got time to look at Jensen from up close. Jensen looked even more rugged with his tie missing and the two of his top shirt buttons open. There were a few water droplets clinging to his neck and Jared couldn’t miss the glimmer of a silver necklet buried amidst the thick mat of chest hair that was visible through the gap of the shirt.

To his horror, Jared could feel the stirrings begin in his loins again. ‘Oh no, please don’t,’ he begged his body not to react to the delicious sight in front of him but damn.. it looked like his cock was not under his control anymore.  
He was becoming more hard by the minute just when Jensen turned and started to say, “I might have to give you an injection for making your pe…” his words hung in the air as he saw the tent that had formed in front of Jared’s groin.

“Oh,” he said startled. “Good, we usually give an injection to make the penis erect for this particular sonogram, but in your case, I’m going to forego of that as I see that you already have one.” he smiled to make Jared feel at ease but Jared was in a full blown panic as he started to apologize, “I.. I don’t know why this is happening.. am sorry.”

“No need to feel sorry, Mr. Padalecki,” said Jensen easily as he maneuvered the probe in his hand and applied a dollop of KY Jelly on its head. “As I said, it’s a good sign that the blood flow is normal to your penis,” he said as he opened the garment to expose Jared’s erect cock. Jared’s penis was rock hard but Jensen didn’t show any reaction whatsoever on his face as he brought the head of the probe to place it on the length of Jared’s cock; he ran the probe up and down while carefully avoiding looking at Jared’s cock and keeping his eyes compulsorily glued to the monitor on the sonogram machine. He had to remind himself that he was Jared’s doctor and this was the millionth time that he had done the procedure. Yet, right now, he was having very sinful thoughts that he didn’t think he could have while attending to any other patient. He was having a hard time to not steal more glances at Jared nor to stop feeling lustful at the way Jared was lying there nearly naked.

A few minutes in to the procedure, Jensen’s experienced brain knew that there wasn’t anything wrong with the blood flow nor was there any blockage in any of the ducts leading to the penis. But he wanted to tread a little further, so that he could be a hundred percent sure. Not to mention that he was enjoying the moments of fondling Jared’s gorgeous cock even though it was with the help of the probe.

Jared initially flinched at the coldness of the lube when Jensen started to probe his cock, but he soon started to enjoy the pleasure as Jensen started to move the lubed probe along the length of it, rounding about the base and coming to rest on the top of the penis. Jared’s breath hitched when the probe touched the head of the cock and rested there for a moment while Jensen punched a few buttons on the keyboard with his free hand. He could only envision what Jensen’s hands could actually do on his cock if there was no probe and the imagination coupled with the enticing person in front of him was enough to fill him with thoughts of deep desire. God, this image was going to be in his memory for a long, long time.

The probe started moving again, up and down the shaft and on all sides around the base of the penis and Jared was having a meltdown of sorts. He was at the receiving end of a sweet torture and he literally was at the verge of tipping over. Every time the probe touched him, moved along his shaft, and caressed him on the head of the cock, Jared shivered and gritted his teeth so that he didn’t end up having an accident again. He only wished that Jensen wouldn’t look in his direction because he was having a hard time keeping under control and he was sweating profusely in spite of the AC. His hands clasped on the bedding beneath him and squeezed it tightly so that it could stop him from moaning out loud.

Just when Jared couldn’t take it anymore and was about to ask Jensen to stop lest he’d make a fool of himself like he did some time back, Jensen himself took the probe off Jared’s cock, cleaned the probe head with a tissue paper and put it on the holder on the sonogram machine. He took a few pieces of tissue and handed them to Jared, “Here Mr. Padalecki. You can clean yourself up. I don’t see anything wrong with the sonogram results. So I think, we can proceed to our final test.”

Jared was thankful that the test finally came to an end as he sat up and mumbled an ‘okay’ under his breath. He was still a mess from the exertion, so he kept his eyes downcast and used his long bangs to try and hide his flushed face from Jensen. But from where Jensen was standing, he could see that Jared was blushing and he couldn’t look away. The image of a blushing Jared was too much for Jensen to process at the time so he quickly distracted himself by starting the process of disconnecting the wires from the sonogram machine and pushing the bulky machine out of the way. When he was finally done, he turned towards Jared and asked, “So, shall we proceed now?”

Jared glanced up at Jensen and noticed that Jensen’s emerald eyes bore into Jared’s. Jared was at a loss for words, as he felt light headed and drained of energy to go on. If he could, he would have loved to have some time for himself to recuperate from the exertion of near orgasm but he wanted to get this over with as soon as he could, so that he could get back to the safety of his home and cocoon in his bed for the rest of the day discerning his pitiful existence.

“Yes, I’m sure, lets finish this.”

“Okay,” said Jensen as he discarded his gloves in the dust bin and wore a new set before approaching the bed. “This is called the prostate examination which will require me to check to see if your prostate gland is in working condition and if there are any abnormalities regarding the size or shape. This might require you to completely relax and let me do the job. I’m hoping going by the other results, you should be totally normal, but I need to make sure just the same. That alright with you?”

Jared was only half listening as he was feeling feeble, physically and mentally. He didn’t know what a prostate gland was and how it would be measured. May be another machine like the sonogram, who knows. Right then he wanted it done with, so he nodded his head vigorously that he understood. Since he heard the doctor say that he needed to relax, he leaned back in to the pillow and closed his eyes.

Jensen removed a few attachments near the foot of the bed and the last quarter of the bed dismantled and folded down making the bed 3/4th of its original length. Jared was jarred from his reverie as he suddenly felt the earth move from under his legs.

“Don’t be alarmed,” said Jensen as he came forward and held both of Jared’s legs by the calf. “Mr. Padalecki, can you bend your legs at the knees and keep them folded on the bed like this?” he helped Jared’s legs to bend and he rested his feet facing down in front of his knees. He spread Jared's thighs wide enough so that Jared’s pink hole was properly visible to him. Jared flinched as the cold breeze from the AC hit his asshole and tried to constrict his thighs involuntarily but they were held strongly by Jensen who placed them as far as he could, away from each other as he focused all his attention on his pink hole. Jared plopped his head back on the pillow to look away from the scene of being inspected that closely by Jensen.

“Good, now I want you to take a deep breath and let it out slowly, as slowly as possible until I tell you to stop. Will you?” asked Jensen as he squeezed a generous amount of lube on to his hand and smeared it all over his fingers.

Jared nodded, closed his eyes and took a deep breath. And as he started to let it out slowly, Jensen inserted his gloved middle finger into Jared’s puckered hole.

“What the…” Jared jumped up and startled Jensen for a second. He stared at Jensen, his eyes wide, as the reality started to dawn upon him. He was still staring at Jensen, while Jensen spoke, “Did I hurt you?”

“No,” said Jared as he didn’t know what else to say. “I .. I just didn’t know that prostate exam was done this way.”

“Oh, sorry. I assumed you knew. This is the only way to check the prostate. And if you relax well enough, you wouldn’t know a thing. So shall I proceed?”

Jared’s heart was beating so fast that he was afraid that Jensen could hear it. “Oh okay, just … just be careful there.”

“I’ll be doubly careful, okay?” smiled Jensen. “Now if you could relax and breathe in and out once again for me.”

Jared was feeling anything but relaxed; however he didn’t want Jensen to see that. He rested himself again on the bed as he exhaled slowly. Jensen thrummed the entrance with his gloved finger, applying some lube and then inserted his middle finger very slowly into Jared’s hole. “Now try to breathe normally Mr. Padalecki.”

Jared shivered as Jensen’s finger entered his hole fully until his knuckle. He tried to breathe normally but with the state of his nerves, he only managed barely. Jensen slid his finger out and reinserted it gently once again. He did that once or twice to loosen his hole before he put in his index finger along with the middle finger.

Jared lurched up and let out a little yelp and Jensen asked in alarm, “You okay?”

“Uhm.. I’m.. Yeah,” replied Jared, though he was swimming in a myriad of emotions. Was he okay? No, he was not. Jensen Ackles, the most handsome doctor he had ever seen in life, was literally fingering him and how was he supposed to relax? The image of Jensen fucking him from his previous day’s fantasy entered his mind and he could sense the beginning of yet another big boner coming. Oh dear god, Nooo!

Unaware of Jared’s discomfort, Jensen continued, “Okay, good. So now I’m going to feel around the rectum to see if everything is fine.” Jensen used his two fingers to feel around the rectum to look for swelling or any other abnormalities that his fingers could pick up. There was none, so he proceeded to go deeper. “Okay, I’m gonna go in a bit more to check your prostate now,” he said as he curved his fingers upwards and went a little deeper, where he knew by experience, the prostate gland was located.

Jared was seeing stars. Literally.

The moment Jensen’s fingers had reached in and touched something, his mind went kaput and his body took control. Jared had never experienced anything like this in his entire life as he completely gave in to his body’s need and lay there enjoying the gamut of sensations. It was like there was a treasure that was lying in him that Jared knew about, but didn’t have the key to unlock it. And guess, who had the key to his treasure chest?

Jensen’s fingers were relentlessly probing the most pleasurable part of his body and Jared felt his body jerking and trembling and he let it go along the path of pleasure. It was like sweet electric shocks starting from his groin and spreading everywhere like short bolts of lightning. He was shuddering and shivering like a leaf in great storm, completely helpless and in the mercy of his master.

It didn’t help that the one who was giving him these pleasurable sensations was the most handsome Dr. Ackles, who with his intense focus, was driving him to a state of insanity. Jared was just about aware that he was lying on a hospital bed undergoing some sort of test, but he wasn’t in the state of mind to make sense of the situation. He was past caring about his surroundings now since he was experiencing the most pleasurable moment of his life for the first time.

Jensen had done this procedure a thousand times in his experience as an Andrologist that it had lost all its allure and had become just one of the medical processes, without any sexual importance attached to it. Until then, he did it with no emotions attached to it, just as a mere ritual in a myriad of procedural steps seeking solution to a medical query.

But now, it felt different. This was not any normal patient lying there. This was Jared, the most gorgeous muse of his, of whom he hadn’t stopped thinking about from the time he met him. The most beautiful Jared, who had made him look forward to being here today, for whom he made the entire day free of appointments. It’s not that he had developed deep feelings for him, but Jared certainly brought an excitement in him, a yearning that Jensen thought he had lost long back.

There was a loud moan that filled the room which made Jensen to seize up momentarily. He looked at Jared to see if he was alright but Jared’s reaction made his heart stop for a second and then start to race madly.  
Jared was moaning on the bed, his half lidded eyes watching Jensen and his teeth catching his lower lip. It was one of the fuck-me faces that Jensen had seen so often on the boys he was just about to fuck and Jensen did not know how to react.

He continued to watch Jared intently as he twiddled around the prostate to see if there was any abnormality to the gland but his experienced fingers could feel none. That, confounded with the normal results he got from the previous tests, confirmed his theory that there was nothing wrong with Jared’s reproductive system and there was nothing physical was causing his ED. And if ED was the reason for Jared’s non-performance, there was no evidence to it, as Jensen just watched the garment fall apart revealing Jared’s penis in maximum erection. To further his theory, Jensen wanted to push the test a little more so that he can ascertain that Jared’s penis was reacting well to the prostate stimulation. So he kept massaging Jared’s prostate to see how his penis reacted, even as the guy was falling apart moaning and writhing away.

“Please, doctor…..oh please,” Jared started to whimper and beg as Jensen continued his ministrations, observing the effect it had for Jared’s cock. Jared’s cock was stiff as a rock and he was leaking copious amounts of pre-cum that was now oozing out, all the way down his cock and balls and forming a wet patch on the bed underneath.  
After he became confident that Jared’s cock was reacting well to the internal stimulation, Jensen now directed his attention to Jared.

Jared was a mess with his hair wet with sweat and a few strands of which were sticking around his delectable face. Jensen looked at him fascinated as he pulled his fingers out and inserted once again to thrum on the prostate, eliciting a shriek from Jared as he threw his head back and arched his chest up. His garment had come out at the knots due to Jared’s incessant movement, exposing his nipples with their pink swollen tips enticingly peaked and Jensen watched everything as a whole, mesmerized. Jared was falling apart in his hands in the most beautiful way possible and Jensen couldn’t get enough of that.

He tried to keep his excitement under control but he couldn’t stop watching Jared lying there near naked, looking as delightful as a decadent porn star. He was looking at Jensen with pleading eyes with his cheeks flushed, his lips quivering and with his breathing coming out in strangled gasps. His skin was glistening with sweat and his hair was in pleasant disarray, completing the look of utter debauchery. Jensen found that the sweat from his face trickled down and collected at the base of his neck next to his clavicle and he had an irrational instinct to reach and lick that all up in one swipe of his tongue.

The more he studied Jared and the way his body was reacting to the test, Jensen was becoming all the more sure, what was causing Jared’s problem in the bedroom. Although he started to suspect it at the end of the first test, Jensen wanted to be doubly sure before he would come to a sure shot conclusion. The cause of Jared’s Erectile Dysfunction was entirely a different thing, one that Jensen would explain to Jared in a bit.

Just as he decided to end the procedure and start to withdraw his fingers from Jared’s hole, Jared started to moan loudly and explode into an intense orgasm. Jensen momentarily froze and watched in shock as Jared whimpered, his penis flailing and squirting everywhere while he lay thrashing on the bed, failing to control his movements.

Though caught off-guard, Jensen sprang up to action and in a vain attempt to control Jared’s cock from squirting everywhere, he stepped forward and tried to hold it with both his hands. But since Jared was already far too into it, Jensen’s touch only increased the intensity of his orgasm as he squealed and ended up squirting the final loads of his cum directly on to Jensen’s startled face.

Jared felt weak and spent. His body was still recovering from the best orgasm he ever had in his life and it took him a few moments to come to the realization of what just went down.  
He blinked his eyes open to see Dr. Ackles still standing in the same spot between his legs, his face one of surprise, with cum dribbling down his cheeks and nose to all over down his mouth and chin.  
Jared sat up immediately, horrified. He didn’t see it happen, but Jared instantly knew that he must have squirted on Dr. Ackles’ face.

“I.. I’m sorry.. doctor… I didn’t… mean to,” he couldn’t think of anything coherent to say as he was coming to terms of what he had just done. He kept looking at Jensen with his heart beating out of his chest as Jensen took a few tissues from the stand and quietly wiped down his face off the mess.  
And as Jared was still looking at him in horrified silence, he smiled at Jared and handed him some tissues to clean himself while he walked to the door, opened it and went out, leaving Jared behind, bursting into tears.

To be continued......  
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	6. Chapter 6

Jensen came out of the bathroom, toweling his face and neck when he heard that. A low whimper. He was startled and looked into his office and Jared wasn’t there. He immediately hurried in to the examination room to find Jared huddled in the same place as he left him a few minutes back, partially covering himself with a blanket, crying. Jensen could only see his back rack with sobs occasionally and for a moment Jensen stood paralyzed.

The next moment he scurried to hold him. “Hey, What’s up? Does something hurt? Jared, answer me.”

Jared brought his hands down and looked up at Jensen for a moment, looking frazzled and Jensen was stunned to see that his eyes were red and mildly swollen with crying.

“Whoa! Jared, tell me what happened?”

Jared shook his head and then mumbled, “I’m sorry for what happened just now,” and Jensen hurriedly brought some tissues to wipe his face. Jared took the tissues from his hand and wiped away the tears and got up to stand, still holding the blanket to hide his almost naked body.

“Okay, here’s what we gonna do. I will turn to the other side and you are gonna wear your clothes. Then, let me take you to my office where we can talk, okay?” said Jensen as he gave Jared his clothes from the peg hanger and he stood facing away from him.

He heard the gentle ruffling noises as Jared wore the clothes amidst some sniffling and Jensen had an overpowering need to turn and comfort him. But he stood his ground and waited until Jared finished.  
After a moment he heard Jared say, “Yeah, I’m done,” and he turned to look at Jared. Jared looked a bit more composed now, although Jensen could sense this was far from over because he looked embarrassed and his downcast eyes looked heavy with tears.

“Well, let’s go then,” Jensen said as he led Jared to his office and made him take his seat opposite him at his work desk.

Jensen brought a water flask from which he poured a glass and gave it to Jared to drink. Jared didn’t refuse it, although he sipped it, taking in tiny amounts at a time, his mind still deep in thinking.  
Jensen gave him ample time to recover and once Jared placed the tumbler back on the desk counter and looked up at him, he gave him a reassuring smile.

“Well, first of all, Jared, I don’t want you to feel bad about what happened back there. I’m a doctor and this is just another day at work for me. What happened there wasn’t that uncommon. And you aren’t in the wrong for how your body reacted in a that scenario. At the end of the day, it’s all biology, you know?”

His eyes downcast, Jared somewhat nodded and asked, “So, what happens now?” 

“Well, we now compute the results and come to a conclusion.”

Jared merely nodded without saying anything because he knew that more was coming.

“And going by the preliminary and the current tests, I can assure you that nothing is biologically wrong with you.”

Jared was quiet, waiting with bated breath for what was coming.

“Uhm.. can I ask you a few more questions about your personal life, if it’s okay with you, Jared?”

Jared stiffened but holding his nerves he looked up and asked, “Like what?”

Jensen was looking at him with concern as he told him, “Since I’m your sexual advisor too, I may need to know a few more details before I can confidently tell you what I feel.”

“Uhm…. Okay.”

“This problem that you have been having, has it been only with your fiancée or has it been with other women too?”

“Um….Only my fiancée….”

“Which means you didn’t have ED when you had sex with other women in the past?”

Jared was still and unresponsive, staring down at his palms, placed on his lap.

“Uh… Jared?”

Jared looked up, “I… I have never been with any other woman…. ever.”

Jensen expected this answer, although it surprised him still. “Okay,” he simply said.

“Gen was my first and I haven’t tried it with anyone else.”

“Okay, very well,” Jensen said jotting down in his notepad. “My next question would be a little more forward. Please understand that this is important.”

Jared kept gaping at Jensen with his red rimmed eyes, as Jensen continued, “Back then, you said that you watched porn on a regular basis, may I ask you what kind of porn it was?” 

Jared looked stunned for a second and then he started to stammer, “I….umm…why.. is ..it ..necessary?”

Jensen bent forward on his desk and looked Jared straight in the eyes. “Look Jared, I understand this may be a little difficult for you to confess. But I assure you that this is important. Please, answer my question?”

Jared looked intently in to Jensen’s greenest eyes and saw that there were only kindness and empathy in them, but he still couldn’t come to face them. He looked downward and replied, “Just porn….. like…. what everyone watches.”

“Okay…. have you ever watched gay porn, Jared?”

Jared looked up immediately, his eyes big and alarmed. “Umm…. No… I mean.. yeah.. once or twice.” There was silence from Jensen as Jared stared at him, “What, are you trying to say guys never watch gay porn?”

“I didn’t say that. Of course, guys do watch gay porn on a regular basis and it’s not a big deal but can you tell me, what you watch majorly? Is it het porn or it is gay porn?”

Jared blanched and swallowing hard, he said, “Um.. I don’t know what to say. There have been some gay porn I’ve been watching.”

“Okay, lemme put it this way. Of late what kind of porn have you watched on sequence? Has it been het or gay?”

Jared looked up at Jensen in irritation and blurted out, “Okay, Where are you going with this?”

Jensen looked stunned and fell silent and watching him, Jared sprung into apology mode. “Oh, I’m sorry, doctor. I know it’s not your fault. It’s just that I’m a little wrung up of late.” Jared placed his elbows on the table top and put his head in his hands.

“There is nothing wrong in feeling confusion, Jared. I’m only asking you these questions because I want to help you. You are paying me to diagnose your condition and all I want to do is to help you come out of it. But if you don’t feel comfortable talking to me, maybe I can refer you to other sexologists that can help you.” Jensen followed that by taking his phone book and looking up some numbers.

Watching him, Jared went into panic mode, “No.. no. I’m sorry for my outburst. Please, I don’t want to go to any other doctors. It’s just that….. I don’t know…. what’s wrong….. with me,” Jared’s voice broke as he started to fidget around with his fingers.

“Please, Jared, I want to help you. But I can’t do that if you don’t give me honest answers. Please understand that we both are on the same page here. I hope you realize that whatever you say to me here, will not be discussed outside this room. I can give you that promise.”

Jared was quiet for some time before he took a deep breath and said….”Okay… Yeah… I’ve been watching gay porn of late….. Like all the time…. It’s the only thing I watch these days….. I don’t know why but I can’t go back to watching het porn…..” he said, looking horror stricken.

Jensen cocked his eyebrows in reply as he nodded his head in understanding and asked after a moment of hesitation, “Have you ever considered that you could be more than a het, Jared? Like a bi or gay?”

“What?” Jared gasped and looked at Jensen in horror. Although he kind of expected this conversation to happen in his life which was the reason he primarily avoided going to the doctors regarding his problem, he still couldn’t believe it his fears had finally become true. “No … no… no.. no.. this can’t be happening,” Jared blurted as he got up from the chair abruptly. 

Jensen tried to calm Jared down, but Jared wasn’t in a condition to listen to him, tears were flowing down his cheeks and he started to pace up and down the room as he started to lament. “No, please, don’t tell me I’m gay, I’m not. Look, I’m engaged to be married in 2 months okay? If anyone even hears this, what would they think of me? What would happen to my marriage? I won’t be able to face my parents, my family, friends.. oh god!”

Jensen came rushing from the other side of the table to hold Jared and make him sit down. He once again poured a glass of water and made Jared drink as someone knocked at the door. He looked up to see the lab assistant Michael, put his head around the crack of the door. For a moment he couldn’t understand what was going on as he stared at Dr. Ackles trying to calm down a man who was sitting there crying bitterly. 

“Yeah, what is it, Michael?” Jensen asked him tersely.

“Um, it’s time to lock the clinic, doctor. I thought you had left long back but I thought I heard voices,” he said.

“Uh huh, okay,” said Jensen as he looked at Jared and said, “It’s time to shut the clinic for the day, Jared. Can we continue our session on Monday, perhaps?”

Jared looked at Michael with tearful eyes and back at Jensen and nodded his head. “I’ll get my things,” he said and got up, promptly collecting his wallet from the desk. 

As they came out of the office, Jensen walked along with Jared to the elevator and pushed the button. He observed that Jared was a complete mess, trying to control his emotions but having a hard time doing it. As they took the elevator and entered the basement car park, Jensen asked him gently, “Jared, where have you parked your car?”

Jared blinked his eyes a few times remembering that he hadn’t brought his car to the clinic since Gen had taken his car for tennis and he had taken a cab. “Oh, I completely forgot. I came in a cab today. No, problem, I’ll walk up to the road and flag a taxi.”

Jensen thought only for a moment before he said to Jared, “Um, Maybe I can drop you off. Where do you live?” He desperately wanted Jared to feel better and more than anything and he was reluctant to let go of Jared alone in the state he was in.

“It’s no problem, doctor. I have already been too much of a trouble today.”

“No worries. It’ll not be any trouble at all. Actually, I already missed a brunch that I had promised to attend and I was gonna go home straight and relax for the rest of the day. So please, tell me where you live and I’ll drop you off.” Jensen said, as he unlocked his car and sat in the driver’s seat and he leaned and opened the door for Jared to get in from the other side. 

“Okay,” said Jared hesitantly, as he got in the passenger seat and closing the door. “I live at Maple drive on the sixth avenue, but if it’s gonna be a detour for you..” Jared stopped talking as Jensen was staring at him. “What…?” he asked unsurely.

“Jared, I live there too. I live on 7th cross at Maple drive. Where is your house?”

“I live on the 5th cross. Oh my god, that’s a big coincidence,” he said as he wondered how he had not met Jensen when he had gone on long jogs in the mornings and covered 7th cross street many times.

“Small world,” said Jensen as he started the ignition and took the car out of the parking area. As he maneuvered the car in to the busy traffic, he kept taking stealthy looks at Jared sitting beside him. Jared was still in a depressed mood as he was looking into his hands, deep in thought. Jensen didn’t want to disturb him though he badly wanted to ask him how he was feeling. He couldn’t wait for Monday to come so that he can discuss this in detail. 

As he was nearing maple drive, he dialed his home number from the car phone. The ring went a few times and was eventually picked up. A woman’s voice in a deep southern accent answered. “Hello Mr. Jensen.”

“Maria, my brunch plan has been cancelled, so can you please make something for me to eat before you leave?” Maria from the other end giggled, “Si. I forgot about your brunch plan and already made a pot of chili.” Jensen chuckled, “Very well then, Maria. Can you leave that on the table and leave? Thanks you so much.” Jensen replaced the receiver just as the 5th cross came into view. 

“This is 5th cross street, where is your house, Jared?” 

Jared cleared his throat before answering, “On the next left turn and it’s the 2nd house on the right.”

“Okay,” said Jensen as he maneuvered the car into the turn and stopped the car in front of a small yet beautiful house with a small, cute front lawn. “Is this it?”

“Yeah,” Jared said as he looked out the window at his house. But he didn’t make any effort to get down. He was sitting still as if he was contemplating something in his mind. 

“Um…. Jared?” called Jensen, gently.

“I slept with a man,” blurted out Jared without warning.

“Wh…. what?”

Jared nodded his head and said, “Yes….. I slept with a man…. I know I shouldn’t have…. That’s when everything started to go to shit.” Jared put his face in his hands as if he was ashamed to have blurted out his secret to Jensen.

“Oh,” said Jensen, looking at Jared. He was stunned by the sudden confession coming from Jared but it also validated his diagnosis all along. He suspected what Jared’s problem was and now he knew.  
As much as he could view the whole thing from the place of being his doctor, he was also feeling irrationally jealous of the man who got to sleep with Jared. 

He was brought out of his rumination by the sniveling noises coming from Jared as he was crying again. Looking at him in that condition, Jensen was suddenly overcome with an emotion that was surprising even to him and he said, “Jared, I don’t think you are in a condition to be all by yourself in your house now. Would you like to come with me to my house until you feel alright? It’s just two blocks away.”

He was even more surprised when Jared didn’t object but looked up at him with red rimmed eyes and nodded in the affirmative. Jensen was overjoyed as he didn’t ask him again.  
He started the car and immediately zoomed off in to the street towards his house.

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	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dear readers,
> 
> Thank you for your patience to bear with me for uploading this chapter after a considerable long gap. As I said, I had some commitments to finish and I'll try my best to upload the rest of the chapters as soon as possible from now on.  
> Thank you so much for your support. Love ya.. 💕

As the car approached the big massive gates of the two- storied, huge sprawling bungalow, Jensen used his remote controller from the car to open the gates. As the gates opened and the car entered the compound, Jared looked around in awe in spite of the condition his mind was in. “Oh," he exclaimed, "So that’s how I missed you. You must be new here. I know that because I saw this house getting renovated 6 months ago.”

Jensen parked the car and applied the hand brake before turning to Jared and nodded. “You are right, I moved in like 4 months ago. I only bought this place last year and went in for a thorough renovation. Again, small world,” he smiled.

Jared took in the surroundings as he alighted the car and Jensen lead him up the way to the entrance. No sooner than he unlocked the door, two big Labradors came tumbling to Jensen and he scooped them up while they licked his face. “These are my boys, Jupe and Nep,” Jensen made the introductions and Jared kneeled down to pet them. They were very obedient as they licked Jared’s hand and wagged their tails to show their gratitude of being acknowledged. Jensen opened a tub of dog treats and threw one for each before taking Jared down the hall.

Jared stared at the beautiful huge hall, done in dark wood décor with high rise beams and a comfortable sitting area, complete with a large TV and a small library. “C’mon, I’ll show you the inside.” He said as he led him to a beautiful open kitchen that was completely hidden from the door way. There was a beautiful wooden and granite staircase leading from the side of the living room to an upper mezzanine of rooms.

“What would you like to drink?” asked Jensen as he opened the fridge and took out a beer can for himself and held the door open for Jared to decide. “Umm… I’ll take a beer too,” stated Jared and Jensen passed him one.

Jared sat on one of the high stools beside kitchen island as Jensen took two swigs of his beer and placed it on the counter. “Please make yourself comfortable while I’ll go, change my clothes and be back in a jiffy,” he said, leaving Jared there by himself. The dogs followed him up the stairs as Jensen petted them all the way up. Watching their cute display of affection, Jared sat there smiling, taking regular swigs of his beer. As his eyes went exploring the kitchen, they caught sight of the fridge magnets and he quietly slid off his stool to take a closer look.

There were pictures of Jensen in various stages of his life, him with his parents, him holding tournament cups, him catching a huge fish, and him in his graduation uniform receiving his honors. There were more pictures of him with Daneel and another woman, who Jared guessed to be Daneel’s partner, holding a small baby and the same baby as a grown up child, smiling along with Jensen, in a car.

He got startled by the soft sniffing sound behind him and turned around abruptly, as if he was caught doing something wrong.

Jensen was right behind him, smiling, while both his dogs were standing by him looking up at both of them, wagging their tails. Jared flushed, trying to come up with an explanation for him to be inspecting the photos. “I’m sorry, I was just..”

“Hey, don’t be sorry, its fine,” said Jensen as he went to the refrigerator and opened two packs of dog food and heated them in the microwave before laying them in their bowls for Jupe an Nep to eat. As the dogs started to eagerly lap up the food, he opened the refrigerator again to take out some greens. “Now I’m gonna make some salad to go along with our lunch,” he said as he took out a knife from the counter and started to wash and cut the greens.

Jared started to breathe easy and only then did he notice that Jensen had changed from his formal suit to a sports t-shirt and matching pants to go with it. The shirt hugged him like second skin and Jared could see every muscle of his torso bulge as he moved maneuvering things around the kitchen. He stared at him in spite of himself but before he could hold himself in check, he blurted out, “you look… nice."

“Oh thank you, I figured I have to go to the gym in the evening, so..” Jensen shrugged his shoulders.

‘Great,’ thought Jared, bitterly. ‘Just the thing I need now.’ He avoided looking at Jensen so he directed his focus on the labs who had just finished eating their lunch and now sitting down licking their paws. As he bent down from his high chair to pet the dogs, his t-shirt rode low on the front and his impressive pecks became visible just beneath the V of the neckline. It turned out to be an extremely sensual visual to Jensen as he stood above Jared watching him. ‘Stop it, you are his doctor and this is not the right thing to do,’ his mind’s voice started to warn him, so he quickly turned away.

“I hope you are hungry because going by my maid’s sense of proportion, she must have made enough Chili for four people to eat.”

“Oh,” said Jared, “I’m actually not that hungry.”

“You’d be, once you get a whiff of that heavenly Chili,” assured Jensen with a smile as he continued to mix all the ingredients in a big bowl and carried it to the dining table. ‘C’mon Jared, I’m starving,” he said, as he carried two more cans of beer along with it.

Jared wasn’t feeling hungry but he followed Jensen diligently to the dining table that overlooked a French window and a huge pool. “Your house is beautiful. You did a great job of renovating it,” he said sincerely.

“That’s all Daneel. She and her woman partner are designers. I just gave my contract to them and didn’t even visit until they handed over the key. She is my childhood friend and I have great trust in her. And I was mostly busy with establishing my practice for the last 2 years ever since taking it from my dad. It’s just for the past 6 months that I have got some reprieve, since I have employed enough doctors to share the practice with me. Now I mostly work on prior appointments. Therefore it’s easier to spend more time at home,” said Jensen as he laid the table with plates and cutlery.

“I see,” said Jared. “Do you live here alone?”

“Actually my brother lives with me but he’s mostly on business tours, so he isn’t here half of the month. Plus I have my daughter Noel, who I share custody with Daneel, come here and stay with me during the weekends. She was supposed to be here today but since Daneel had to visit her in-laws, they have taken her with them for the weekend.”

“Wow,” said Jared as he mulled over everything Jensen said. Jensen seemed to be a responsible guy, a great doctor and a wonderful father by the sound of it and his respect for him grew even more. But the part about his marriage or sharing a kid confused him. He remembered Jensen saying that he provided the sperm for the lesbian couple to have a kid. But what about him? Does he have a girlfriend? He wanted to know the answers to the burning questions in his mind but he lacked the courage to ask him anything directly.

He realized that Jensen was still looking at him, so he continued, “I…. want to thank you for this gesture of inviting me here for the afternoon. Honestly, I’m overwhelmed by your concern. I’m sorry for being such a pain-in-the-ass-patient, cuz, you truly don’t deserve this.”

“Nonsense,” dismissed Jensen with a wave of his hand. “Jared, inviting you here was totally my decision. Let’s just say, I was alone and miserable and I thought, given your situation, you could give me company.”

“You are being kind, but I’ll take that, anyway,” smiled Jared warmly. After a bitch of a day, the doctor’s kindness was truly helping him forget his woes. “Thank you, doctor,” he said as he took a helping of chili and put it in his plate.

“You can call me Jensen,” smiled Jensen, as he broke a loaf of warm corn bread and placed one half on Jared’s plate.

“Okay,” Jared smiled back at him, “Thank you for everything, Jensen.”

“That’s more like it,” chuckled Jensen as they both started to eat. The Chili and the corn bread combination was delicious and hogging them down, Jared realized how hungry he actually was. They demolished the food in five minutes flat and continued to drink more beer as they continued their conversation. Talking in length about sports, pets, cinema and politics, Jared didn’t know the time passing, it was almost 5 in the evening when he looked into his watch.

“Oh dear, I didn’t know the time was 5. I mustn’t have wasted so much of your time, Jensen. May be I’ll take leave,” he said and got up from his chair.

Jensen looked at him in surprise, his mind thinking of something quick to say as he supposed, “Jared, I was wondering, why don’t you stay for dinner? I’m planning to make a mean steak with potatoes and gravy, and it would be a bitch to eat that all by myself.”

Jared didn’t know what to say. The last few hours spent with Jensen was the best time he had had in a long time. He had never clicked with anyone so well on their first meet. He and Jensen shared similar interests in every aspect of life and he actually felt bad that he had to leave.

“Umm, Only if I won’t be a bother and only if you let me assist you in cooking.”

“Done deal,” said Jensen smiling and seeing him smile, Jared smiled too.

Jared couldn’t remember the last time he had so much fun with someone doing mundane things. He and Jensen made a good team as they cooked together in the kitchen. Jared could see the quirky side of the doctor come out as he showed off his culinary skills. Jared laughed so much at the way he burnt the first batch of the gravy sauce and the way he kept saying “son of a bitch” when things went wrong.

It was almost 7 by the time they lay the table for yet another meal. The steak was smelling amazing and Jared couldn’t wait to dig in. Jensen opened one of the finest wines from his cellar and within the next half hour, they had finished the full bottle of wine and were ready to attack the steak as if they’ve been starved for days. They both felt very well buzzed with the wine and before long they were laughing and chatting like longtime friends. When they finally finished eating one of the delicious meals Jared had ever tasted, they stacked the dishes in the dishwasher and Jensen opened another wine bottle to pour more drinks for both of them. They carried their wine along with the bottle to the couch where Jensen set them on the table opposite them.

“What a lovely steak. I got to say that you are not just a great doctor but you are a great chef too,” complimented Jared.

“Thank you,” said Jensen, feeling suitably proud. “I am an expert when it comes to cooking steaks.”

“Do you always cook steaks for your patients or what?” Jared tilted his head and asked him mockingly. 

“Not to all my patients….” Jensen only hesitated for a moment before saying, “Only those, who’s cum I get to taste in my mouth.”

Jared stopped smiling and immediately went red in the face. He shyly looked up at Jensen and caught him grinning at him. “I’m tremendously sorry for that. “I honestly don't know what happened to me back there. I only realized later that I had squirted right on to your face.”

‘And I fucking loved that taste of your cum’ Jensen wanted to say. But he instead said, “It’s fine. As I said, your body lost control. It happens.”

Jared was quiet for a few moments with down cast eyes and Jensen decided to prod him further. “Do you feel you want to elaborate about what you said in the car? I can listen to it as a friend rather than a doctor if that would make you feel comfortable.”

Jared gently nodded his head, “Yeah... I can use a pair of ears to listen to my sob story," he chuckled but still didn't look up at Jensen. "It happened 4 years ago when I was studying in college and was staying at my hostel. He… he was… my senior in college.”

Jensen gently placed his wine glass on the table without distracting Jared and turned towards Jared, giving him full attention.

“It was during the thanksgiving holidays. I couldn’t go back to Austin that year due to my project being unfinished and I wanted to utilize the holidays to submit it on time. So, I stayed back in the hostel while most of the students left except only one or two left in the whole building. I stumbled upon a bump while computing my results and I needed help. That’s when I called and sought the assistance of this guy who stayed in a room one floor above mine. He didn’t go home for the holidays because his folks were on a holiday trip and we were the only ones staying at that time in that wing. Listening to my rant, he offered to help me and came by to my room in the evening.”

For some reason, Jensen was increasingly feeling uncomfortable, but he tried to keep a straight face as he listened to Jared.

Unaware of Jensen’s feelings, Jared continued, “So we sat in my room. I swear, I hadn’t thought of him in that way until that night. I mean, I had always thought of him as an extremely good looking guy and the girls in my class regularly crushed on him, but I never thought I could… you know…” he looked up at Jensen trying to find the right words and Jensen quietly nodded his understanding, a contrived smile plastered on his face.

“It happened all of a sudden. I mean, one minute he was explaining mutual exclusion and block mapping and the next moment we were tangled on the bed tearing each other clothes off. I….. didn’t know…. I had it in me. I completely went crazy and….”

It was painful. As a sexologist and an andrologist, listening to sex stories of his patients had been so routine in his line of work that bored him so often, but it was different with Jared. Jensen felt an invariable fury at this guy who had the chance to sleep with Jared. He knew he was not justified in his stance and Jared had every reason to sleep with who he pleased but right now, it sounded like a punishment to listen to this. He exhaled slowly until he steadied his nerves and then asked him, “So was it mutual?”

“It was…. I mean, we were so engrossed in studying that I didn’t initially realize that his hand was pressed so close to mine and I…. I felt a new sensation that I’ve never felt before….I’m sure he realized that at the same moment and we fell silent for a while before he started to fondle my hand. The quiet night, the empty halls and his nearness did something to me and I let him fondle me…. And.. and …he soon progressed to touch me and I gave in…..willingly.” Jared was shaking as he stared into his half-filled wine glass. He had stopped speaking, his teeth biting his lower lip, as if he was struggling to steady himself.

“So,” asked Jensen, just to make sure, “You had penetrative sex with him?”

Jared looked up like he was stung. “God.. no.. we were like.. doing other stuff.. you know. I was scared.”

“Sorry, but back in the car, you said that you slept with a man.. so I thought…”

“But isn’t that still not sleeping? I did everything else with him.. some, multiple times. So I didn’t know how else to describe it.”

“By everything else, you mean?”

“You know,” Jared said blushing, “Like hand jobs… and blow jobs.”

“Hmm.. I see,” said Jensen. “So, for how long did this affair continue?”

“That was the only time it ever happened. After that, he and I went our own ways. He was a very guy’s guy and it threw him off completely. He was equally perturbed by what happened as was I. So we never mentioned it again until he left college the next year.”

Jensen thought for a long moment, “So you didn’t do it again in the last four years after it happened?”

Jared shook his head.

“Okay, it’s very common for these things to happen to guys. Many guys experiment during their college days. It’s no biggie, Jared.”

“But..” Jared looked down, not able to meet Jensen’s eyes. “Something changed after that.. I started to feel different. I started to observe guys more and I…” Jared bit his lips before saying. “I actually realized that I liked what happened that night. And I .. I wanted more of that.”

Jared looked at Jensen with guilt. “Since I was ashamed of myself and the situation, I sought porn to distract myself. I first started to watch hetero porn, lots of it and masturbated to it. But as days went on, my curiosity got the better of me and I ventured into gay porn. And after that, I.. I couldn’t go back to watching het porn. It’s been almost a year now. I want to stop it and I don’t know how to do it.”

“Hmm,” Jensen said absently, scratching his jaw with his index finger. He was increasingly feeling intoxicated and with his alcohol addled brain, he tried to offer Jared, whatever best advice he could at the moment. “Jared, I know that I said that I would listen to you as a friend and now I would like to give you an advice still as a friend using the knowledge from being a doctor. Would you want to hear it?”

Jared looked up at Jensen and found Jensen looking at him intently and he instantly felt a thrill rush through him. He was feeling quite tipsy and he was glad that he could finally open up to someone about his dark secret. He sighed and nodded his head briefly, ”Okay.”

“But before that, I want to know. How has your sex life with your fiancée been, before and after this incident?”

“I and Gen… have always been sort of lukewarm.” Jared thought for a little while before answering, diverting eyes away from Jensen and focusing on the wine glass in his hand, his fingers drawing patterns on the rim of the bowl as he continued, “She was the first girl who asked me out and I went along with it because my parents liked her and she was my friend. The fact that she wasn’t particularly a very demanding girl, put very little pressure in our relationship. And during the times I was in Dallas, our interaction was minimum as she was studying in Austin. The times we met, we spent them more by going out and coming home late and sleeping tired in each other’s arms. But this was before the incident happened, so the lack of sex in our relationship didn’t bother me at all. But after the incident, especially for the past one year, I can’t get myself to..” Jared stopped speaking and looked at Jensen.

“Okay,” said Jensen, “Have you ever considered that you could be gay, Jared?”

Jared looked up sharply. “No.. I can’t be,” he said, setting his wine glass on the table, determinedly. “That’s where you come in, right? I mean, you will help me figure out my problem and cure me, won’t you? You are a doctor, so you must know the secret to cure gayness.”

“Trust me,” Jensen said shaking his head, “If I knew the cure, I would have used it on myself long, long ago.”

Jared looked at him in shock as words failed him. “You… are gay, Jensen?” he asked finally.

Jensen's words were almost a whisper when he admitted, “Yes, I’m gay, Jared. Have been one all my adult life. Trust me when I say I went through the same grind of insecurity and hopelessness when I initially figured it out. But later on, when I gathered the courage to come out, it all went away. I’d say it’s just a matter of time. If you are really gay, accepting yourself will be the first step. So that’s where I come in as your doctor. I’ll help you help yourself.”

Jared couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Jensen is gay? So while he was speculating about his marital or relationship status, he was gay all along? He couldn’t decide how that made him feel, because on the one hand he was still very sad about his own discovery as queer, but on the other hand, if his sex doctor was gay too, it can’t be that bad right? And the revelation made him secretly happy in his heart, knowing that Jensen is gay too.

He finally managed, “So…. What should I do now?”

“Sometimes, there is no magic cure for things and sexuality is one of them. In my educated opinion, I would say that its time you went about experimenting to see what you really like and then take a decision.”

“What decision?” Jared asked alarmed. In his mind’s eye, all he could see was his parents’ disappointed faces and Gen’s parents judging and ridiculing him.

Jensen could see that Jared was getting restless again, so he moved closer to calm his nerves. “Look Jared. I think you need to postpone the wedding and see if your interests lie elsewhere.” Jensen watched Jared flushing, but continued anyway, “I think you need to sleep with.. men to determine your sexuality.”

Jensen was dangerously close to Jared and Jared could smell the cologne on his body. He glanced up to see the emerald eyes were boring into him. Jared had never seen anyone so gorgeous in his life. The wine was hitting him hard and his brain was swimming in it deliciously. Jensen’s nearness was giving him goose bumps and right then he couldn’t even concentrate on what he was saying.

Jensen was losing it, clearly. He was so close to Jared and he could see Jared’s face from up close and his breath hitched in his throat. Jared’s hazel eyes were looking right into him as if he was intensely studying him; his lips were quivering and Jensen had the irrational urge to reach with his teeth and bite them gently. The neck line of his t-shirt had dropped low and he couldn’t help reaching down there with his eyes and let them roam freely. The wine was making him feel reckless and he started feel heady with lust.

His sudden irrational lust taking over him, Jensen closed the distance between them and took Jared by surprise, crashing his lips on his. “What…,” as Jared exclaimed in surprise but Jensen didn’t give him a chance to speak. Jared smelled and felt so good under him and in a second Jensen was all over him, pinning him into the huge soft cushions, his hands roaming everywhere, touching and groping him. After the initial few seconds of shock, he could feel Jared giving in, his mouth opening to let Jensen in and his bulge against Jensen’s stomach growing larger and larger.

At this point Jensen was a bit over drunk with lust that he rather handled Jared clumsily, running his hands over and trying to tug at the hindering clothing. He lifted the t-shirt well above his chest, bunching it up under his neck as he hungrily bit and sucked at his nipples. He salivated everywhere and licked and kissed him passionately and Jared writhed under the ministrations, moaning deliciously and occasionally letting out a gasp.

Jensen slid his tongue over the expanse of Jared’s milky white skin, leaving little love bites along the trail as he reached up to claim his mouth once again. Jared moaned against his lips as he kissed him back passionately and Jensen felt turned on like he had never been in his life before. “Oh Jared,” he kept repeating that like a mantra as he kept kissing him and rubbing his hardness against Jared’s own and they kept writhing against each other.

But just as when Jensen decided to take it to the next level and reached with his hand to remove Jared’s pant, Jared let out a loud gasp and sat up. He was panting and his hair was in total disarray. With his eyes wide and his pupils dilated, he looked at Jensen in bewilderment. The next moment, he pushed Jensen away, and stood up, trying to straighten his clothes.

Jensen got up as he looked at Jared alarmed, “Jared, is everything okay?”

“I'm sorry," he said, still breathing heavily… "I just have to go now.. You are a nice person, Jensen, but I have to go, sorry,” he blurted out as he picked his wallet from the table top and rushed to the front door.

Before Jensen could realize what happened, Jared had opened the main door and was walking towards to the main gate.

“Wait,” Jensen called out of breath, hurrying behind Jared.. He was stunned by the chain of events that happened in the last few minutes and he was still drunk and feeling indecisive of his next move. He stood holding the door knob and stared at Jared who had stopped walking after hearing Jensen’s voice.

He slowly turned and walked towards Jensen and when he was only a few feet away, he said, “I’m sorry Jensen, you won’t hear from me again. I made a mistake a few years ago and I don’t intend to make it again. You are a great guy and in any other alternate universe, I would have been terribly happy to know you, but right now, my life is complicated and I don’t want to drag you into it.”

“Wait,” repeated Jensen as he walked down the few steps towards Jared. The alcohol induced fuzz had slowly started to drain away from his brain and he tried to make sense of what was happening. Jared was going away and he mustn’t let him go. He wanted to set this right but didn’t know what he should do to make it happen.

“Look Jared, I’m sorry for hurrying you into this. It was the wine, I swear. I assure you I’m a decent guy and this is the first time that I have lost control this way. I will never touch you again without your permission, I promise. I do think that you need more counselling regarding this and I would like you to come by the clinic for more sessions. Together, we can try to fix this. Please don’t go away,” he pleaded as he took Jared’s hand in his.

“Jensen, You are the most lovely person I’ve ever met. And the kindest too. But this is... wrong. What I'm doing with you is wrong. I’m getting married in two months, for Christ’s sake. My fiancée and her over bearing parents are making wedding arrangements as we speak. How do you think I can afford these feelings at a time like this?”

Jared’s voice choked as he continued, “So, for our own good, I think we should not meet again or I’m afraid, I might never leave you,” Jared said as his face turned red, tears rolling down his cheeks. "Goodbye Jensen," he said waving, as he turned on his heels swiftly and walked away even as Jensen kept staring at Jared's retreating figure.

__________________________________________________________


	8. Chapter 8

Jared woke up to his doorbell ringing incessantly. He got up from bed and started to walk towards the offending source of noise, semi-conscious. He opened the door when the bell went off again and he stood there staring at the figure at the door, blinking a few times and rubbing his eyes with the back of his hand until his vision cleared.

“There you are,” said the person in a booming voice and Jared stared in disbelief. “Chad?” he exclaimed as memory of his impending arrival came to mind. “Omg.. you were supposed to come today, weren’t you?” he said dazedly as Chad rushed in and hugged him.

“How are you, Jarebear? What’s going on with you? I’ve been trying to reach you all morning. I landed at your parent’s house at 6 and been trying to reach you ever since but since you weren’t answering any of our calls, I had to take your home address to come here myself to check.”

Jared glanced up at the wall clock that was hung over the dining closet. It showed 5 mins to 12 and Jared stared at it in horror. “Fuck, I must have overslept. I’m sorry I couldn’t come to pick you up, Chad. Hope your journey was good,” he said groggily. “Have a seat while I go freshen up and be back in a minute, okay?” he said as he hurried up to his bedroom and shut the door leaving chad in the living area.

As memories of the previous night hit him, he plopped down on the bed and tried not to panic. He picked his phone from the nightstand, that he put on mute from the time he went to the clinic yesterday and forgot to turn on. There were 25 - 30 missed calls, combined from Gen, his parents and Chad. He quickly swiped down to find more missed calls and a slew of messages from Jensen…. Shit.

He quickly called his parents and Gen and told them that he had mistakenly put his phone on mute. He had to concoct an excuse for his absence yesterday and he stuck with staying at home the whole day with a stomach bug. His parents were okay with the excuse, but Gen threw a fit about not informing her since she had plans to go shopping with him for accessories. He told Gen that he’d call her back, while he placed an urgent call to his sister Meg and begged her to take Gen shopping. Meg agreed to extend him the favor and he called Gen and briefed her the new plan. He told her that he’d meet her as soon as possible and Gen reluctantly accepted.

He put the phone back on the nightstand as he sighed and walked to the bathroom. He stared at his reflection in the bathroom mirror, as if looking at himself for the first time.

He’s gay and it only took 24 years of his life to realize that. Not until the world’s most handsome doctor made him come twice in his hands and tried to have sex with him in his house.

Jared splashed cold water on his face as he tried to think about what happened the previous night. He ran away from Jensen’s house not because he didn’t want to have sex with him. He ran away because he wanted to have sex with Jensen. So desperately, that now, just thinking about it, made his belly ache with want. But that’s exactly why he couldn’t do it. It’s enough that he gave in the first time and had sex with Tom in college. There’s absolutely no way he could convince himself if he did it another time especially when his marriage was only 2 months away.

It was over 45 minutes when jared came out of his bedroom, smelling like sunshine, and Chad nodded appreciatively. “Hmm. Seems like you have filled in quite well in the last few years. You used to look like a beanpole. But, look at you now. How did this happen, man?” asked Chad slapping Jared on his arm.

“Guess, I just got lucky,” Jared smiled and continued, “I’m so sorry to have kept you waiting like this, Chad. Don’t tell this to my parents or Gen but I went partying with my old friend last night and I got smashed. This morning has been too rough for me.”

“More like afternoon,” said Chad looking at his watch. So, tell me where shall we go for lunch? Perhaps we can catch up while we eat something.”

Jared’s stomach rumbled right then, letting him know that he was famished. “Okay, Let’s go to Carluccios. They have the best pizzas in town,” he said.

“Well then, let’s go, I’m starving” said Chad as he picked his keys and got out along with Jared.

The pizza was delicious and so was the pasta. Chad licked his plate clean within 10 minutes after the food arrived at their table, but he could see that Jared was deep in thought, picking at his food. “Hey what’s eating you up, man?” he asked, slurping his slushie. Jared acted startled as if someone woke him up from his sleep. “What?” he asked, dazedly.

Chad studied him for a moment and then said, “Look, I can see that something is bothering you from the moment I met you this morning. What is it? You are getting married to your high school sweetheart, but you don’t act like it. I’ve been trying to get you to talk about the wedding for the last hour, but you been changing the topic each time. What’s up?”

Jared blinked and shaking his head, he said, “Did I? I didn’t even realize,” he said chuckling, trying to brush it off. “What’s there to say? The wedding is going to happen just the way Gen wants. So, everyone’s happy. That’s what matters, no?”

“Your happiness matters too, Jared. I met Gen at your house in the morning and she seemed quite excited. Her parents have invited me to their dinner on Friday evening and I said yes. So, seeing how everyone around you have been enthusiastic, I felt you were a bit off. So, what’s bothering you man, what is it?”

For a moment, Jared contemplated telling Chad about everything. And then he remembered how close Chad was to Gen and how protective he was about her. They literally behaved like siblings, so he didn’t know how Chad would react if he said that he was rethinking about the wedding. “So, what’s the plan for the day?” he changed the subject.

“I got the appointment letter from Alistair, which is an Austin based real estate company and I’d be joining them tomorrow. This will be my orientation week, so I’ll be a bit busy until coming weekend. I have seen some listings for houses on lease, so I’d be glad if you could accompany me while visiting them.”

“Okay,” said Jared as he took a final sip of his slushie. “Let’s do some house hunting now.”

Jared opened his phone and went through his messages from Jensen, while Chad was busy watching the road. Jensen had repeatedly apologized for his coming on to him last night and pleaded him to call him back. Jared quietly erased the messages as he finished reading them. He had no plans of ever going back to the clinic, much less to talk to Jensen again. Jensen was a wonderful person, and he deserved the best in the world, but going forth, Jared’s life is going to be riddled in secrecy and lies and he didn’t want Jensen to have any part in it. He had no plans to cancel the wedding nor to come out to his parents or to Gen in the future.

He put the phone in his pocket, swallowing the heavy lump in his throat and trying to keep his tears in check as they threatened to come out any minute. Jared only had 6 weeks to work towards becoming the husband the society expected out of him and he was going to try his best achieving that.

It was almost 8 p.m. when Chad dropped him back at his house. Chad had short listed a few houses that were closer to the place where he would be working, and he hoped to finalize on one within that weekend.

As Jared was about to alight the car, Chad asked him casually, “Hey Jared, what about Jeff? Is he coming to attend the wedding?”

“He was giving me some bull shit reason of being too busy at work, but I told him that he has to make it to the wedding much in advance since I’ve asked him to be my best man. So, he’s definitely coming, why do you ask?”

“Just like that. Meg and her husband are coming too, right?”

“Of course, Meg is hands on with the wedding preparation with Gen. They have been choosing bridal dresses all week, so they’ll be busy. Even today, they had been to one of the show rooms to shop for some accessories.”

“Good,” said Chad. “So, would Jeff be bringing his girlfriend or coming alone? I want to know because I’m planning to bring my girlfriend.”

“Wait. You got a girlfriend here in Austin? You sly dog, you didn’t tell me.”

“Yeah. It’s been on and off, we used to meet whenever she visited Houston. She’s not my girlfriend per se but a girl who is a friend-with-benefits,” winked Chad.

Jared chuckled. “You haven’t changed at all, have you? Okay, bring your girlfriend along, but discuss with Gen about the placements because I think she has already planned your seating along with some of her other friends. And Jeff is still single, so unless your girlfriend has a friend, he’d very much be alone.”

“Hmm, okay, I’ll talk to Jeff and ask him if he needs a date for the wedding. Okay then, Jarebear, thanks for spending the day with me. I’ll try to meet you before Friday if I can make it, okay?”

“Fine, see ya,” said Jared as he got down and walked towards his door. He already could see that Gen had left his car in the driveway as she had promised him on phone, who’s key she had left under the doormat. He lifted the doormat and picked the car key up, then opened his front door and went in before waving once again to Chad and shutting the door.

He plopped on the sofa and tried to switch on the TV when his phone buzzed. He groaned thinking it was another call from Gen to tell him about her day, but he froze when he saw the name on the screen.

Jensen.

He stared at the screen the name Dr. Ackles for a long while as it kept ringing before going into voicemail. Once the call got cut, he opened the voicemail to listen to his message as his heart hammered away.

“Hey Jared, just calling in to check on you.” There was a brief pause and then he heard his voice again. “You don’t have to meet me, but I beg you to not stop coming to the clinic. I feel responsible to have ruined your progress and I want you to continue taking the therapy. I can recommend a particularly good friend and colleague of mine who would be glad to help you. Please don’t cancel your next appointment. I’d be expecting you and I’m sorry again for what happened.”

The message ended and Jared placed the phone on the table and went inside to fix dinner for him. He wasn’t the least bit hungry, but he just wanted to keep himself occupied by doing something than to think about Jensen. He opened a can of beans that he picked from the cupboard and went to sit in the couch, his mind numb and heavy.

Gen had called him incessantly for the next few days to discuss various things regarding their wedding arrangements. He had a stock answer to excuse himself from all the chaos. He pretended that Gen and her mom had the superiority when it came to good taste. “Gen, you know how bad I am at these things. You and your mom know the best. Please choose whatever you want to do, and I’ll be okay with it.” That worked like a charm and Gen was more than pleased to carry on shopping with her mom without troubling Jared.

Jared immersed himself in his project at work and came home late, using the excuse to drop out of a few dinners that Gen had arranged with her father’s friends and colleagues. He missed out on meeting Chad, which he really hated but Chad was understanding as he was in a good mood owing to his job ending up being the way he wanted it to be.

On Thursday, though, Jared left office a bit early and went to meet him at his new office. The office was a huge multistoried building, and he was directed to Chad’s floor by the receptionist. Chad came to meet him in the lounge, and they went for coffee in the building cafeteria where they got a few minutes to unwind.

“So, what’s going on with Gen and you?” asked Chad as they waited for their coffee to arrive.

Jared blinked. “What do you mean?”

“It’s been four days since I’ve come to Austin and I haven’t yet met you both together?”

“So?”

“Look, I know you like the back of my hand, and don’t you give me this crap, Jared. What’s going on, I can see something is up with you. You seem distant and broody.”

As their token number was called out, they went to collect their coffees from the counter. Jared didn’t reply immediately but continued to sip his coffee, thinking deeply. A few moments later, he said, “Okay, there is a small chink, I am having second thoughts about the wedding.” He said and glanced up at Chad, wearing an uncomfortable expression.

“See, I told you there was something,” Chad simply said as he set his coffee mug down. “So, why are you having second thoughts?”

“I think I’m sort of rushing into this,” said Jared. “I mean, think about this, I haven’t met anyone before Gen proposed to me, right? What if there’s someone out there for me that I get to meet later in life. I’m only 24, Chad. It’s bound to happen and what if it does? How am I even sure about something that’s going to last forever like a marriage?”

Chad continued to drink his coffee and when he finally set his mug down, he asked, “Okay, I agree 24 is too early, but if you weren’t too sure why did you agree to this, Jared? And is it the right time for you to have second thoughts, when your wedding is due in a month and a half? Don’t you think that it’s too late to have these doubts?”

“I understand. That’s why I’m devastated. What am I going to do now?”

“There’s nothing you can do now,” said Chad as he looked sternly at Jared. “Look, if you had come to me earlier, I could have helped. But now, it’s too late. Think about this. What’s going to happen that would make you regret marrying Gen? Like sleeping with other women? As someone who has done that plenty, let me tell you that its overrated. We all want to settle down one day with someone who we love and someone who loves us, and given your scenario, there would be several guys who would love to have what you have. So, don’t throw it all away for something as trivial, Jared. You are going to hurt Gen if she comes to know of this.”

Jared sighed. There’s no way he can explain to Chad without giving the complete truth. He glanced up at Chad and relented, “I guess you are right. I think I need to work harder at accepting this truth. But until I come around, do me a favor and stop pestering me about my shitty mood, okay?”

“Fine, but you need to spend some quality time with Gen if you want this to work out, okay? Like, go out for wedding shopping with her and get yourself more involved. That will make you get into the grind.”

“Okay, I’ll try my best,” said Jared, getting up. “So, I’ll meet you at Gen’s place tomorrow evening. Do you want me to come to pick you up? Is your house ready or are you still staying at your office accommodation?”

“I’ll get my keys to the new apartment tomorrow morning. If you can drop around by 6 pm, that would be nice.”

“Sure thing, take care, Chad, bye.” Jared left the cafeteria and took the elevator to the car park while he reflected upon the conversation he just had with Chad. He once again contemplated telling the real reason for him to reconsider his wedding during their chat, but again, he couldn’t get himself to. He knew that he blew his only chance at making Chad see his perspective. The only person who could have understood his predicament right now, was Chad, but Jared couldn’t even gather the courage to come out to his best friend. He didn’t have the guts to do that and he didn’t think he ever will.

He sighed deeply as he swallowed his disappointment and got out of the elevator.

It was eight o clock Friday morning and Chad had called Jared ten times already. “I packed everything you asked, Chad, what is it that you want now?” asked Jared on the phone as he knotted his tie in place. “Jare, you need to help me. You know how I love my morning coffees. My coffee maker broke during transit and being caffeine deprived for so long is driving me crazy. Can you bring yours while you come here? Oh, and bring some coffee vials along with it.

“Okay,” sighed Jared and cut the call. Chad had called him in the morning and told him to come to his new house to assist him in setting a few things. Jared had agreed and already called his office to take the morning off. But now Chad has been calling him every few minutes to add on things for him to bring along.

The phone rang again, and Jared picked with annoyance and growled, “I’ve had just about enough of you. What is it now?”

There was a pause on the other end and Jared could hear someone breathing. Jared’s brain short circuited and he instinctively knew who it was.

A moment later, Jensen’s voice came over the phone, “Well… I didn’t expect that.”

Jared’s breath hitched as his heart leapt to his throat and he had to sit down on the bed because his legs felt too weak to support him. He gripped the phone hard until his knuckles turned white, but he couldn’t speak. It was as though there was a vice on his throat that constricted his vocal cords from working.

On the other end, Jensen continued, “Well, I thought that there was a slim chance that I could make you forgive me, but now I know I don’t. I’m sorry I troubled you, Jared. I won’t call again.”

The phone went dead in his hand as Jared dazedly brought it down until it rested on the bed.

He still couldn’t speak, there was a heavy lump in his throat and the tears were thick that threatened to fall any minute. Jared tried to bring his emotions under control, but he couldn’t and finally he let the tears fall down.

It was half an hour later when he could bring himself to get up from bed, wipe his tears away and walk to the bathroom. He splashed cold water on his face and dried with the towel, picked up the bag and left the house.

As he was driving to Chad’s new house, he couldn’t stop thinking about Jensen and how broken he sounded over the phone.

Hearing Jensen’s voice made him realize how much he loved him and how much he missed him. All the resolve melted away as he heard his husky voice over the phone, and he wanted to tell him how much he loved him. But the shock of hearing his voice, completely threw him off and he froze him out. And now Jensen thinks that he hates him. A part of him wanted to call him back and tell him that it was not true. That he loved him just as much; that there’s been little else that he thought of in the past week since leaving his house; and that he would like nothing better than to meet Jensen just one more time to look at his handsome face and bury himself in his arms.

But he could do none of that now. Jared’s hands have been tied and he was not in a position to nurture such thoughts.

May be what happened was for the good, in a sense. There is no way that Jared would tell Jensen that he doesn’t love him to his face. He could hardly trust his emotions and if he ever got the chance to meet him again, he might break down and make a fool of himself by confessing his love for him. Which is why he shouldn’t meet Jensen ever again. Jensen was a closed chapter in his life and must remain so.

He parked the car in front of Chad’s apartment building and got out. He opened the boot and picked the large bag and carried it to Chad’s door on the second floor and rang the bell. Chad opened almost immediately and sighed a relief as he saw Jared. “Thank god you are here. I was going out of mind, man. Look at all this mess,” he pointed to the inside of the house and Jared walked in to take a look. The items were haphazardly placed and there was no semblance of order anywhere.

“The movers agency did a shit job. I only own a few things, but they couldn’t even fix them for me. They cited a last-minute agreement discrepancy and left them as they were. Now I need to fix the furniture and the TV unit all by myself. It’d only be possible with the help of an engineer like you, Jarebear, so please help me.”

“That’s what happens when you to for the cheap agencies,” Jared said as he placed the big bag on the floor. “Look, I got the things you asked for. Now let us start setting things up and may be in an hour or two we can manage this,” he said as he started to pick things from the floor.

“Okay, where’s the coffee maker?” asked Chad as he looked inside the bag. “Can’t find it here.”

“Oh shit,” exclaimed Jared and he face palmed himself. “I forgot to bring it.”

“What?” whined Chad. “I’m gonna go crazy if I don’t have my coffee now, Jared. And I don’t even have the instant mixes with me here. That was the last item I told you to bring. How could you have forgotten?”

Jared knew how. Jensen’s call made him into a crying mess and into a fucking zombie that he wasn’t in a position to use his brain faculties for some time. “Okay, stop whining. Assist me in fixing these and I’ll take you over to a popular coffee joint nearby,” said Jared as he started to fix the legs of the center table.

“Hmm.. whatever,” said Chad as he joined Jared and they started to consult the manual to fix the couch.

It was almost 11 by the time they fixed all the furniture and arranged the items in the kitchen. The apartment looked livable now and Chad quickly brought out the vacuum cleaner to clear the debris.

They set out soon in Jared’s car to the coffee bar that Jared frequented during the weekends. “If I had known that I had to do such hard labor, I wouldn’t have worn my formals,” complained Jared as he sat in the driver’s seat and loosened his tie. He was sweating from all that work and he cranked up the AC in the car and directed the vents to his side.

“Oops, sorry about that Jarebear. Just for that, I’ll assume the costs for the snacks that we’d order,” Chad offered.

“Nah, it’s fine. I’ll pay now. But, when you settle down, you are going to take me to a Havel’s for a treat, okay?”

“Sure man, anything for you.”

They drove for a few minutes and entered an affluent neighborhood with lots of trees and widely paved streets and Jared parked the car in front of a building structure with glowing neon lights that screamed THE BOOMERANG. The place was cozy but less crowded owing to the time of day.

There were semi-circular cubicles lining the perimeter of the bar and half of them seemed occupied by customers. They went in and took seats in one of the cushioned cubicles as Chad opened the menu to read. “Okay, I’m going to order a sandwich for us. I’m starving,” Chad said as Jared got up from his seat. “I’ll go, place the order since it’s my treat to you as I had promised.”

He went to the cashier’s desk and took his place in the line. There were two more customers before him and it took Jared a few minutes for collecting his order and bring it to the table but as he walked back to their cubicle and placed the tray on the table, he noticed that there were two men leaving the cubicle next to them and as one of them saw Jared, he walked straight to him. The other man followed the first man, and they approached the table and the first man smiled at Jared and said, “Hey, how you doing man?”

Jared thought the guy looked familiar but couldn’t exactly place him. The guy came closer and introduced himself. “I’m Tom. Tom Welling. Ring any bells?” he laughed and removed the glasses that he was wearing, and Jared felt like a bulldozer hit him.

It was Tom….. The senior boy that he had sex with in college.

Jared visibly blanched, color draining from his face as he stood rooted to the spot.

Of course, Tom had grown a bit different from his college time; he had a thick, well-groomed beard now. His shaggy hair was gone, and in its place was a well styled upswept hair do, held together by hair gel. He looked sophisticated and affluent, but those blue eyes remained the same. And Jared can know those blues from anywhere.

Suddenly, he wanted to sit down so badly. He felt his stomach knot and his legs give way.

Why? Of all these years, why did he have to meet him now? Just when he wanted to put his painful past behind him and focus on his new life?

Chad looked confused looking from Tom’s face to Jared’s waiting to be introduced but Jared wasn’t in the mind to remember courtesies. His brain was still reeling from the shock and he hardly knew how to react.

“Tom, are you not going to introduce us?” asked the man who was with Tom, smiling politely at Jared. He was an impressive looking man, as tall as Tom, with longish features.

“Oh, I’m sorry Mike. This is Jared. Jared, this is Mike,” said Tom making the introductions.

Mike made a gasping sound as he stared at Jared for a moment. “So, this is the Jared you were talking about? The one who made you realize your sexuality and made you come out of the closet?”

Jared froze and felt his tongue turn to sandpaper. He couldn’t get a word out and he looked at Chad, praying he did not hear that.

Chad was frozen in his seat as he gaped at Mike with his jaw open and sensing Jared gaze on him, returned the look.

“I see you have come out of the closet too. Is this your boyfriend?” asked Tom as he extended his hand towards Chad.

Chad was silent only for a moment and the next instant he took Tom’s hand in his and said buoyantly, “You guessed it right. I’m Chad, Jared’s boyfriend. Its so nice to meet you Tom. But I’m afraid Jared hasn’t talked much about you.”

“Really?” asked Tom as he sat down in one of the seats around the cubicle. “He never told you about his first gay experience?”

Jared tried to intervene. He honestly did. But it was like an accident was happening in front of him, and he was unable to stop it. He was watching the mayhem getting unleashed, but he had no power to contain it. He helplessly watched Tom and Mike get comfortable around the table as they sat down, and Tom started to tell Chad all about the incident.

Jared took a side glance at Chad and found him looking at him intently, a half-smile on his smug face, as he listened to Tom about the one time he slipped and gave in to his temptation.

“So, until that, I was the college Jock, always very cocky and abrasive. I troubled a lot of wimpy kids and treated women like objects. I was never into women that much but since they flocked to me, I used them. But I always felt a bit awkward and sensed I was missing something. All that changed the night I had the blessing to be with Jared. Without going into details, I’ll say that the encounter made me change myself and sent me on a path of self-recovery. After a lot of self-loathing and suicidal thoughts, I met Mike, who helped me realize that it wasn’t wrong to be queer. It’s been 2 years since and we are going steady. So, that’s our story. What’s yours?”

Chad smiled sweetly, “Wow, wasn’t that the greatest inspirational story I’ve ever heard after our own Jared Padalecki? You should ask him yourself. He’ll be able to explain this better than me.”

They all looked at Jared expectantly and Jared felt like a trapped deer. The tears that he managed to control all morning when he heard Jensen’s voice, found their escape now, like a waterfall down his cheeks. He started to speak amid tears. “Tom, I’m so happy for you that you found the courage to discover yourself. But I’m not that brave. Nor lucky. I’m due to get married to a girl in two months and I’m sick in my stomach just thinking about it. Chad here, is a dear friend. Nothing more. I’m glad you came out of the closet and found your soul mate but I won’t, because I’m not yet out of the closet and I have no plans to do that anyway.”

There was pin drop silence for a minute as Tom got up to go and Mike followed suit. “I’m so sorry to barge in like this and ruin a fine morning, Jared. I honestly thought that you both were an item because I saw you both nudging each other and laughing, so I mistook you both for a couple. Now I think we should take leave. If you need anything, here’s my card. I and Mike work together in his studio. He’s a celebrity photographer and I’m his assistant. Call us sometime if you feel like it and we would be happy to host you for a drink. And, best of luck with your marriage,” Tom placed a name card on the table in front of Jared, bid farewell to Chad and left along with Mike.

Jared picked the card up without a word and put it in his wallet. He didn’t once glance up at Chad. They ate in silence and drank their coffee and once they were done, Jared got up and said, “Let’s go,” and Chad followed him wordlessly.

It wasn’t until after 5 minutes of silent driving when Chad spoke. “So… did that have anything to do with what you told me earlier about re-thinking the wedding, Jared?”

Jared still didn’t reply, he drove silently until he reached Chad’s office and parked the car in front of the gate. “There is no point talking about it because as you said, its too late, Chad. There’s no way I can do this to Gen or to my parents. I think I will manage, and I don’t want you to talk about this to anyone, you hear me?” he looked squarely at Chad with red rimmed eyes and Chad nodded hesitantly.

Tipping his head in turn, Jared was gone in a flash and Chad stood there for a long minute staring at the back of the car.

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	9. Chapter 9

Jared got little work done at the office. His eyes kept shifting from his computer screen to his watch every few minutes as he was dreading the evening party with Gen and her family. Moreover, he would have to pick up Chad from his place before reaching her house and he dreaded facing Chad even more. They didn’t have time to discuss the thing that happened in the morning, but it won’t be long before he would have to.

Also, the get together, which was initially planned to include just the family, had blown up to a full-gusted party, which now comprised of some of both of their dads’ friends and acquaintances. The venue had been shifted to their garden, where huge parties were usually conducted, and Jared didn’t know how to feel about it.

The silver lining was that, he didn’t have to face Gen’s parents singularly and get they advised by them how to go about life; but the downside was to face all their friends and to be the center of attraction as their future son-in-law. Jared didn’t know which was worse.

The moment the clock hit 5.30, Jared packed his laptop into his briefcase and set out of the office to the parking lot. He didn’t try to think too much as he drove straight to Chad’s house.

He parked his car outside Chad’s apartment gate and called him, and after four rings, Chad picked up. “Are you here?” he asked.

“Yeah, I’m waiting down in the car.”

Chad replied briskly, “I’ll be down in a minute.”

Jared cranked up the A/C and decreased the volume of the radio. His mind was in a chaos and he didn’t need more noise to add to it right now. And then, the car door clicked, and Chad got in the front seat beside him. Jared didn’t dare look at him, and Chad didn’t appear to be very interactive either. After settling himself in, he asked tentatively, “Hey, how do I look? These were the only formals I had on me at the moment.”

Jared gathered his resolve and turned to look at him. Chad wore a powder blue pin striped shirt and dark navy pants and he looked quite boyishly handsome. His bleached hair was spiked up with gel and gave him an elfish look. Jared smiled faintly. “You look great, Chad… as usual.”

“Okay then, let’s go.”

“Yeah, but before that…” Jared let his words trail.

“What?”

“Umm… Chad, about what happened today at the coffee house,” Jared flushed furiously and turned his head away.

Chad sighed before answering, “Yeah…. what about it?”

“Ar.. Are you mad that I kept this secret away from you?”

“Hmm.. a little bit, yeah,” Chad nodded. “But I looked at the bright side of it and it’s not that bad.”

“What bright side?”

“Well, I’m not the one who is getting married to you and have been kept in the dark about your sexuality. Because, if I was, that would suck big time.”

Jared looked at him with hurt eyes.

“Look, Jared. I think you let this go too far, buddy. You’ve been at a crossroad in your life, but I think that the path you have chosen will lead to a very unhappy married life.”

Jared fell silent against the muted sounds from radio and the AC. They sat like that for a long moment when Chad asked him, “So, how long have you been gay?”

Jared looked at him sharply, stung by his words. “Look, Tom was the only guy I had sex with which wasn’t even to the full extent, if you know what I mean, and I haven’t had another similar experience ever since. I thought it was only a phase, you know?”

“So, are you gay or straight or bi now?” asked Chad incredulously. “I don’t see how this could be a problem if you are a bisexual guy, because a lot of guys experiment during college and still turn out to be straight and go on to marry girls.”

Jared sighed big and remained quiet. Watching his silence, Chad said, “So, this is bigger than I thought. Do you think you can marry a girl and lead a sex life with her?”

Jared continued to be silent and Chad said annoyed, “For god’s sake Jared, answer me. If you haven’t slept with any other guy after that and if you don’t intend to, why would marrying Gen be such a big problem?”

“Cuz, I met somebody,” said Jared in a mere whisper, his eyes focussed on his fingers on the steering wheel. He finally turned towards Chad and met his eyes, “I finally met somebody, Chad.”

Chad found his jaw drop, “But you just said that you haven’t slept with anyone else.”

“Yes, but I didn’t meet this guy until a week ago. And I haven’t slept with him.”

“Okay, who is it?”

“Doesn’t matter. I already ended things with him. But the time I was with him made me realize that I could very much be gay, Chad. Oh, this is such a nightmare. What am I going to do now?”

Chad was deep in thought for a few moments and then he said, “I think, the best thing for you to do is to come clean to Gen and end this, Jared. You will only make things worse for yourself and Gen. Imagine the kind of life you both will lead if you go ahead with this marriage, a life full of lies and dishonesty. Would you want that?”

“No, but I think I can work this out. As of now, I’m not involved with men of any kind and I intend to keep it that way. I will work hard in my marriage and I will succeed. You will see, Chad,” said Jared and pressed the ignition key as Chad sighed in exasperation.

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Jensen realized that the table had gone silent all of a sudden. He looked up from his plate to see that Daneel and Meg were watching him expectantly and understood that he had not been paying attention. They were seated at the lake side facing terrace of Bordell's, enjoying the weekend brunch.

‘Um, what was the question again?” he asked guiltily.

“Jensen, what’s been eating you? You seem distant and depressed. What’s bothering you? Any trouble at the clinic?” asked Daneel, reaching out to place her hand on Jensen’s.

“Nothing,” he said, his eyes immediately going to Noel, who was sitting beside him, slurping the ice cream cone, not paying any attention to them. She looked cute in her pigtails and looking up at Jensen with her big eyes, she exclaimed, “Daddy, you need to try this, the chocolate chips are so crunchy.” Jensen smiled despite himself as he reached out and caressed her face, tucking the stray hair behind the ear.

Daneel didn’t look convinced at first, but as her eyes went to Noel, she understood that they weren’t in the proper company for such talks. She knew there was something going on with Jensen for the last several days, but she didn’t want to pry. But for the last week, he looked completely miserable and sulking at home, not caring to return her calls. The brunch was her idea to get him to come out with them, so that she could ask him what it was about. But going by his hesitation, she knew that there was something that he would like to discuss, but not while Noel was there with them. 

“Okay, Meg. Why don’t you drop Noel at Jensen’s parents’ while I go in Jensen’s car to his house? I’ll join you for the evening shindig, I promise.” Daneel said, as she got up and picked her purse from the table.

“What?” asked Jensen in puzzlement. “Noel was supposed to spend her evening with me, right? Why do you want her to drop her off at my parents’?”

“Uh.. Jensen, I’d like to discuss something important with you at your house. Noel can be at your parent’s until we are done. You can go and pick her up any time after that,” she said as she dragged him by his hand to get out as quickly as she can.

After kissing Meg and Noel a quick goodbye, Jensen hurried after Daneel. Daneel was quiet on their drive back home until they were inside of the house and after settling down on the couch with a drink in their hands, Daneel asked, “Okay, hero! Now tell me, what’s going on with you?”

Jensen rolled his eyes. “So, the whole ruse of wanting to discuss something important was about me? Oh God, Daneel, I thought something was wrong between you and Meg.”

“Trouble between me and Meg? Not in your dreams, mister. We both are thick as thieves in everything we do, so you don’t need to worry about us. Although, we both thought something was going on with you. So, you are going to tell me what that is.”

Jensen thought for a long moment before talking. “Daneel, remember how you used to tell me that I need to give up on one-night stands and the short-term affairs and settle with one?”

“Oh my god! Don’t tell me you found one?”

Jensen sighed deep before answering, “Yes, as a matter of fact, I found one. But it can’t happen between us in a million years. That’s why I was in a depressed mood. My heart has been broken, Daneel. And I trying to deal with it.”

Daneel gasped. “I can’t believe someone turned you down. The nerve? You are the most eligible bachelor in the whole gay world and this guy has the audacity to reject you? On what basis?”

“He’s getting married to a girl in 2 months. Is that good enough of a reason?”

“Wait! This guy is not gay then? You fell for a straight boy, Jensen Ackles?” Daneel asked incredulously.

“To make you understand, I need to start from the beginning,” said Jensen as he explained to her everything that happened between him and Jared, the way he met him in office and the way it ended that night in his house.

Daneel chuckled after hearing the whole story. “Pardon me, Jensen. But you fell for your patient? Isn’t that against the law or something?”

“Yeah, yeah. I know. Which is why I was ready to suggest to him to see one of my colleagues instead of me. But that technicality is not the problem, here. The actual problem is, Jared is closeted and won’t admit to it. I can see that he is going to ruin his marriage and the life of that girl he’s going to marry.”

“Hmm,” said Daneel as she thought about it for a while before shrugging. “You know what, you are a very handsome, good hearted man and if that boy doesn’t see it, well, that’s his loss. I really think that you need to forget him and start going out more with other willing boys who would fall over others to be bed by you.”

“Oh, stop it Daneel. You know about me. I know I can get million other guys. But I want only this guy. You need to see this boy to know why I fell for him. He is everything I ever wanted in a man. But I can’t have him. Universe could be so cruel sometimes, couldn’t it?”

“Hmm, okay. I understand that, Jensen. But right now, you need to get out and distract yourself a bit. How about going out with me tonight? I’m about to attend a party with Meg and I can squeeze you in. One of my would-be clients’ is having a party in honour of his daughter’s wedding. Why don’t you join in. You don’t have anything to do tonight and can use this distraction.”

“Oh Daneel, I don’t know. Besides, Noel is at my parents and I have to pick her up.”  
  


“You can pick her up tomorrow. Your parents love to have Noel over and Noel loves to stay there. Listen up, mister. You are going to come with me and that’s an order.”

Jensen sighed and surrendered finally. Daneel could be forceful sometimes but he himself felt that he could use some distraction for the night. “Okay, I’ll come. But who’s party is it?”

“Peter Cortez. He's the general manager of the Gerald corporation who are into garment exports. They just signed me to redesign some of their offices owing to their employee count going up since last year. He was insistent that and Meg and I attend this party. I’ll call him and let him know that I’m bringing an extra guest with me tonight and honestly, I pray that you could meet a suitable boy in the party, so you wouldn’t have to have your heart broken ever again.”

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	10. Chapter 10

Jared waited with bated breath as he rang the bell and waited for the door to open. Chad stood close behind him, holding the wine bottle for Mr. Cortez, that he specially bought on the way home from his office, along with a bouquet of flowers for Mrs. Cortez.

The door opened and Gen threw her arms around Chad. “Chad, you made it. Well, I thought you guys are never going to make it today, it’s almost 7, what were you guys doing?”

“Umm, I had something come up in the office in the last minute,” Jared lied, as he entered the door and hugged Gen. “So, is everyone here, already?”

“No, just your parents and mine and a few more people who were their friends from college. The official invitation for the rest was about 7. 30 pm, so I wouldn’t be surprised if we got guests as late as 8.”

“Okay, let’s go inside,” said Jared and entered the living room where there was noisy chatter going on. Gerald and Peter were presiding and retelling some old story and the small group around them that comprised of men in suits and matrons in evening gowns, laughing at their every word. As soon as Gerald spotted Jared, he got up and announced to everybody. “Friends, here’s my son, Jared, the lucky groom who is about to get married to our beautiful Genevieve. And Jared, come here, I want to introduce you to my close college friends that you haven’t had the chance to meet before.”

The next half hour went in Jared greeting everyone, and them congratulating him on his upcoming marriage to Gen. Jared kept nodding his head in acceptance of their wishes while subtly rolling his eyes to Chad. Chad had comfortably found himself a seat in a corner of the room and he sat there sipping off his champagne and studiously reading the room.

Peter excused himself at one point and after going in the kitchen looking for Camille, he found her arranging flowers in a vase. He cornered her and took her aside. “Camille, there’s going to be a small change of plans in the seating arrangement. Didn’t I tell you earlier about the two women designers that I had invited? One of them just called to let us know that she’d be bringing another single male guest along. I know you had already planned their placements on the dining table, but can you just squeeze this person in there too? He seems to be a popular doctor in Austin, and wouldn’t it be cool to put him along with us on our table?”

Camille made a disgusting face as she heard her husband speak. “For heaven sake, would these broads stop screwing up my plans? I finished rearranging the seating only this morning. Do I have to do it again?” She dramatically sighed and then added, “Okay, I’ll see what I can do. Maybe I can place this guy in Mark’s place and shift the lawyer to Martinson’s table. Seeing that the Martinson’s are going for a divorce soon, Mark can be of use to them,” she said chuckling and Peter pecked his wife on the lips. “You’re a doll, that’s why I love you,” he said as he quickly left the kitchen to join the rest of the guests.

Jared quietly left the crowd and walked into the garden behind the house. The whole place looked different with the dining arrangements and the butlers were readying the food counters by the side of the wall as an array of mouth-watering dishes started to arrive from the catering vehicle.

Jared steered clear of them and walked around to find a secluded corner hidden by a heavy growth of bougainvillea. He sat on a cement bench and thoughtfully took a few swigs of his drink. His moment of peace was soon ruined by the arrival of Gen and the moment she found him, she exclaimed, “There you are. I’ve been looking for you everywhere. Someone told me that they saw you walk to the garden, what the hell are you doing here?”

“Um, nothing, just trying to have some peace and quiet.”

Gen gave him a piercing look as she asked, “Would you mind telling me what’s going on?”

“What are you talking about, Gen?”

“Sometimes, I don’t get you Jared. I defend you when others tell me that you aren’t into me or interested in the marriage but when I see you do things like this; I can’t help but feel that they are right.”

Jared stood up startled, spilling his drink on his pants, a little. “Wh..who told that?” he asked alarmed. Has Chad had a word with her? No, he wouldn’t dare. But Gen did mention people in plural. So, who else could possibly know about his intentions regarding the marriage and Gen?

“Oh, please. As if people can’t see for themselves. Okay, it was my mom who asked me what was going on between us both, and honestly Jared, I don’t have anything say for you, when you act every bit like she described; uninterested and unbothered. Why, why would you be like this? Are you seriously not interested in this wedding?” Gen looked at him menacingly and Jared felt his stomach turn to mush. He didn’t know that Camile was on his case like a hyena behind a prey and with her chasing his every move, he had little chance of hiding his feelings in the long run.

He stood there looking like a lost child, unable to answer Gen.

Just then, there were sounds of footsteps approaching them and Gen stopped talking. A moment later, Chad arrived and looking at them both, he recognised something was wrong. “Is everything okay?” he asked looking from Jared to Gen.

Gen gave out an exasperated sigh as she said, “Everything is dandy, Chad, what do you want now?”

“Um, your mom sent for you and Jared. Some new guests arrived, and she wants you both to be there to be introduced to them.

“Yeah okay, we’ll be there.”

Jared didn’t say anything but followed her like an obedient puppy. He was terrified that he was this close to blowing his cover. He needed to work harder if he must convince everyone around him that he was in love with Gen.

And as they entered the hall, Camille came forward and nodding her head at Jared, she took Gen’s hand and navigated through the crowd to the lounge beside the bar, where there were two women seated, nursing their drinks; one with auburn hair in an upsweep bun, looking tall and gorgeous, and a pleasant looking short woman with black hair. They both got up as they saw Camille approach them.

Jared followed Gen and her mother and stood by them with a ready-made smile plastered on his face. He had no idea who they were, although, the red-haired woman looked somewhat familiar.

“Gen and Jared, this is Daneel, and this is her wife Meg, and they are one of the most coveted interior decorators of Austin.”

Daneel extended her hand in front and shook Gen’s and then Jared’s. As Jared shook her hand, his brain fired away, as his heart started thudding in his chest. ‘Wait a second, Daneel? Interior decorator Daneel who is also queer? What are the odds?’

But before he could react, Camille asked Daneel, “So where is your doctor friend, Ms. Daneel? He was here only a moment ago?”

“He went to fetch drinks for himself from the bar, oh there he is,” said Meg and pointed her hand towards someone behind Jared and Jared slowly turned.

Jensen was walking towards them with his eyes still on the drink but as he approached the group, he looked up and stopped dead in his tracks. His eyes were fixed on Jared for a long moment, but he recovered, and smiled at the others.

“Ah, there he is,” said Camille as she made the introductions. “Doctor, this is Jared, my future son-in-law who is engaged to my daughter Genevieve. Gen and Jared, this is Jensen, Daneel’s dear friend.”

Jensen still looked stunned, but he had the presence of mind to extend his hand to Jared. “Such a pleasure,” he said looking directly into Jared’s hazel eyes. “And congratulations. You both make an excellent pair.”

Jared felt like the earth slipped from under him and found his legs turn to jelly. Someone was saying that he was a renowned doctor in Austin who had taken after his famous father and has been creating a niche for himself, but Jared droned out all the voices as his head was spinning. He couldn’t get a word out as he kept looking into Jensen’s handsome features, his freckles, his green eyes and his thick eyelashes and he started to feel the familiar stirrings in his stomach. He finally managed a croaky “thank you,” and retrieved his hand from Jensen’s firm grip.

Camille said an apology that she must steal the couple away to greet the rest of the guests, and Jared was thankful that he didn’t have to be near Jensen because he was sure that he was going to swoon if he stood there for another second. He left the group without uttering another word or giving Jensen another glance.

As soon as they left, Meg turned to Daneel and said, “Why did I find the groom a bit weird? He looked like he saw a ghost.”

“Actually, I felt the same about him. God, he’s a very good-looking boy, but he appeared to have swallowed a fly.”

Jensen sat down heavily on the couch behind him as he said, “I think I may know why.”

Daneel and Meg looked at him in unison. “What do you know?”

“Daneel…. The boy I told you about, who stole my heart and broke it eventually… that was him.”

Daneel’s jaw dropped and she didn’t even try to conceal it. “What are you saying?” she screeched in her nasal tone, settling beside Jensen. “Was that the one you were talking about?”

“Unfortunately, yes.”

“Oh god,” said Meg as she sat down on the other side of the couch. “I know that the world is small, but it can’t be this teeny tiny.”

Jensen sighed. “Oh god, please tell me, this is not happening?”

“I’m so sorry, Jensen,” said Daneel as she held her forehead with her hand. I’d be damned. I promised you an evening of distraction, but I didn’t realize I brought you to the hell hole that you so were trying to avoid.”

“It’s not your mistake, Daneel. You couldn’t have known. Don’t beat yourself up.”

“Okay, here’s what we’re gonna do,” said Daneel in a calm voice. You try and avoid him for the whole evening and once we are done with the perfunctory dinner, we’ll make an early exit., okay?”

Jensen nodded his head and wished he had brought some aspirin with him.

================================================================

Jared excused himself from under Camille’s grasp as soon as he could. He tried to be cordial to every one of her guests with a plastered smile on his face. But inside, he was crumbling to pieces. Why and how did Jensen end up in a party that was thrown by his future father-in-law? Did he plan and ambush him? Was he stalking him? But as soon as those questions arose, Jared quickly admonished them. Jensen was a Gentleman, and he wouldn’t stoop to those levels to surprise him. There must have an honest mistake somewhere. But of course, Camille said that she invited Daneel because she was supposed to design his father’s offices and maybe she brought him along without having a clue about Jared. That must be it.

“Hey Jared, why are you sweating like you been running a mill?” laughed Chad as he joined him.

“Chad, where were you all this while?”

“Cool it man, I found this awesome girl who was hitting on me and couldn’t pass up the chance. Now my night is set with her as she agreed to come with me for a nightcap. Now tell me, am I lucky or what?”

“Yeah, whatever,” said Jared and Chad looked at him curiously.

“Hey, what’s up with you? Why do you look like you seen a ghost?”

“Chad, you remember I told you about this guy I met a week earlier that I fell for?”

“Yeah,” Chad said cautiously. “What about him?

“He’s here.”

“What do you mean, he’s here? Did he follow you here or what? Do you want me to handle him? Where is he?”

“Just stop, okay? He isn’t here to create trouble. He must have come to the party without knowing that it was thrown by Mr. Cortez. Can you see those two women sitting by the lounge? There’s a guy with them in a dark grey suit. That’s him. Those women are the interior designer couple, who are assigned to design my dad’s offices and I believe they brought Jensen along with them.”  
  


“Jensen? Hmm, that’s a nice name,” Chad said as he surreptitiously looked behind him at the spot Jared mentioned. “Dear god, Jared, I have to give it to you man. He’s the most handsome man I’ve ever seen. No wonder he made you question your sexuality.”

“Stop it Jared. This is not the time for your unfunny jokes. He was my… umm.. sex counsellor. That’s how.. it started.”

“Aha… the plot thickens, so what else did he teach you about?” chuckled Chad as he turned and took another glance at Jensen. But this time, Jensen glanced up and caught Chad’s stare and he quickly turned. “Oh god, looks like he saw me checking him out. Never mind. So, what’s going to happen now? Are you going to talk to him or are you going to ignore him for the rest of the evening?”

“I haven’t decided yet,” said Jared.

“Um, Jared, are you aware that you need to take a decision right this moment? The way you look at him and flush at the sight of him, makes me think that you still might have feelings for him. You are doing a wrong thing by going ahead with this wedding and I think you need to tell Gen about this right now. She deserves the truth.”

“Look, I got this under control, okay? This is such an unexpected turn of event, that’s why I was caught off guard. Maybe if I put all my resolve into it, I can wing this.”

Chad lifted an eyebrow at him and shook his head. “Nah? I don’t think so.”

“I’m already very confused about this, it would do me a world of good if you just shut your mouth and kept quiet for the moment. We’ll talk about this later, now, would you wait here? I’ll be back in a minute.”

Chad looked at Jared retreating; “Idiot,” he said aloud, shaking his head.

Jensen got up from his seat, excusing himself to go to the restroom. He was feeling suffocated and he needed some air. But since the garden was filled with the family’s guests and since he feared that he might come across Jared in some way, he tried to avoid it. He wanted to splash his face with some cold water and may be that would make him feel a little better.

As Jensen found the nearest guest men’s room, he entered it without thinking until he almost collided with a person who was trying to leave. Jensen said a perfunctory “pardon me” when he smelt the familiar scent.

“J...Jensen?”

He froze as the door behind him closed and he was face to face with Jared.

“Um.. I.. Jared, I want you to know that me coming to this party was a total accident just as meeting you here in the men’s room is. I swear, I didn’t know that it was your party, otherwise I wouldn’t have ….”

“I know,” said Jared interjecting, “I will never doubt your intentions.”

Jensen looked unsure as to what he was supposed to say, so he nodded his head, “Thanks man.”

“Jensen, I just want you to know that whatever I was doing in the past week, it wasn’t intentional. Please don’t think that I wanted to hurt you. In fact, the reason I want to be away from you is to not hurt you. I hope you understand that.”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever. Now if you’ll excuse me, I will try to get away from you and this party as soon as possible.” He passed Jared quickly and got into one of the stalls and shut the door. He waited until he heard Jared get out of the restroom and close the door, when he realized that he had been holding his breath. He exhaled slowly, as he surmised that this was, by far, the worst party he had ever been to in his life, not realizing that the worst was yet to come.

====================================================================


	11. Chapter 11

Camille held her wine glass above her head and tinkled it to get everyone’s attention. “Dear guests, please join us in the garden for dinner. Please follow the name cards that we have laid on the table to find your seats.”

Everyone from the hall started to disperse and move to the dining area in the back while Jensen stayed behind with Daneel and Meg for as long as possible, so he could avoid coming face to face with Jared. He felt like crap and wanted to finish the goddamn dinner as fast as he could and get the hell back home.

By the time they neared the dining tables, they were already half occupied. There were four rectangular dining tables, arranged two in a row, each seating about ten people.

Jensen did a sweep and found Jared sitting next to Gen at the table on the right and prayed that his seat was far away from him. He nudged Daneel towards the other side and they both scoured the name cards on the tables to the left with little success.

The butler who was hovering close by, came to help them and after consulting the list in his hand, he led them to the same table as Jared’s. Jensen swallowed hard as he saw Jared staring at him from his seat and with a thudding heart he walked to the table and to his dismay, found that his seat was right across from Jared. Damn.

Daneel’s and Meg were placed to his right and as the butler pulled their chairs out, they thanked him and took their seats. Jensen stood undecided, fully considered leaving the party, citing some reason, when Daneel looked at him pointedly and signaled him to sit down. Jensen sat down quietly without looking up at Jared, who was sitting right opposite him and was watching him in stunned silence.

He found that the blonde-haired boy who was with Jared was sitting to his immediate left, while Jared’s parents were seated on the left to Jared, right opposite to Daneel and Meg. The two seats on either end were taken up by Gen’s parents, with Peter sitting on the extreme right to Jensen and Camille on the extreme left.

Jared couldn’t believe what was happening. He was furtively eyeing Jensen a minute ago, as he saw him enter the dining area, and seeing that the other tables were being filled in quickly, wondered where Camille had arranged for him to be seated. But as he watched him walking towards his table, his heart started to thud and felt his stomach drop. He nearly lost it when Jensen took the seat right opposite to him. He just prayed that others wouldn’t see his face right then because he was literally shitting bricks. He had little idea that the seating arrangements were changed at the last minute because he knew that Mark, who was Jared’s family friend, was supposed to be seated opposite him. He did a quick survey and found Mark was with Martinson’s at the next table, and was already flirting with their beautiful daughter, Sara.

Oh shit. He knew the evening was going to be awkward, but he never knew it was going to be this bizarre. He dared not look up at Jensen in the beginning but as he saw him take the seat opposite him, he had no other choice but to watch him with growing anxiety. Jensen didn’t once look at him and instead, was focusing on laying his napkin on his lap and examining the cutlery. Jared prayed for the rest of the night to pass quickly because this, was by far, turning out to be his worst nightmare.

Once they were settled, Daneel spoke up. “Well, we didn’t expect to be seated at the family table along with the would-be couple and their parents. Guess, it’s an honour and thanks for the same.”

“Well, it was my idea,” Gerald spoke for the first time. “The rest of the guests are our old friends and acquaintances who can take care of themselves, but you are new here. My daughter Meg along with her husband had to cancel in the last minute & take up travel, so we had two seats on our table free. Therefore, I and Sharon decided to seat you among us, and we hope you don’t mind. We were kind of busy being with other guests and missed a good opportunity to properly introduce ourselves earlier. So, welcome to the party, Miss. Daneel and Ms. Meg, we are most honoured to have you work for us. Please feel free to ask anything, we would like you to feel right at home.”

That the was first time Jensen saw Gerald and Sharon. Mr. Padalecki was a big man but was totally bald, and Mrs. Padalecki appeared to be a kind looking woman who smiled as she caught Jensen’s eyes. “And may I know who this striking young man is?” she asked about him, looking at Daneel.

“Um, he is Jensen Ackles, who is a practicing doctor at Ackles wellness Clinic, who is also my childhood friend. I hope I didn’t disturb your plans when I requested to bring him along.”

“Ah, that was not a problem,” interjected Camille from her seat, shrugging. “Mark was supposed to be here with us but going by his enthusiasm right now, I’m sure he is enjoying being with his new company,” she said chuckling, pointing to the next table.

“Welcome to our circle, Mr. Ackles, I’m sure I’ve heard of that clinic’s name before,” said Gerald, thinking. “Is this the same place that was at Granger round-about a few years ago?”

“Um, I’m afraid that was my father’s. When I took the practice from him, I chose a new place in the city, closer to Sunset Valley,” Jensen replied.

“Well, that’s great. Once again, thanks for coming to the party, now let’s start the dinner,” Gerald said as Peter signaled the waiter to bring them drinks.

Jensen’s eyes automatically went to Jared as the waiters started to come to their table for taking drink orders, and he found Jared quickly look away being caught staring at him. Jensen looked away too immediately, as he fixed the napkin on his lap and tried to look around the place to distract himself. But his mind went back to Jared again, taking in how lovely he looked, despite wearing a simple formal shirt with tie. The purple in the shirt brought out his hazel in the eyes and notwithstanding the resolution to ignore him, he surreptitiously took stolen glances.

Jared’s situation was no better than Jensen’s. Once he came down from the shock of seeing Jensen in the party and to meet him again for dinner at his own table, he just couldn’t look away from the most gorgeous person he’s ever been on earth with. And when Jensen chatted with his dad, Jared couldn’t help feeling elated for no particular reason. It gave him a weird satisfaction to see Jensen being cordial to his family and imagined a life to have Jensen as a family friend. He soon rebuked himself for having such sinful thoughts because if he were to function as a married husband to Gen, Jensen’s proximity could jeopardize it heavily.

Champagne and wine soon flowed, and the talk around the table turned more frivolous. “Well, I am hoping our tie-up would mature and benefit us all in the future, Miss. Daneel,” said Gerald as he downed his first glass of neat whiskey. “I don’t know if Peter has told you this, but we are looking into diversifying our business into real estate and we can both benefit from this.”

“Yes, I would love to extend our contract to any future business that we might have, Mr. Padalecki,” said Daneel, as she sounded excited. “Yes, that would be cool. And thank you for considering us for this tie-up Mr. Padalecki,” added Meg.

“I did a little background check on your work in Austin and I have to say I’m impressed, so my compliment for you both is well deserved,” said Gerald as he signaled the waiter to bring him another shot.

Jensen had nothing to do when the conversation was flowing around him, and he was aware how Gen was constantly chattering with Jared while Jared was answering her in monosyllables. He also couldn’t help getting some info regarding how Gen was bored the whole week because Jared wasn’t meeting up with her citing one excuse or another. Jensen didn’t want to act concerned, but for very obvious reasons, that made him secretly happy. So, Jared wasn’t shopping with Gen for his upcoming wedding while Jensen was stewing in misery. It sounded like he too was upset and nursing a broken heart. Thank God for small mercies!

The boy, Chad, sitting next to him, tried to make small talk with him, seeing how Jensen was left behind in the conversation happening around the table and Jensen answered him as minimally as he could. For all he knew, this boy knew about him and Jared because he caught sight of him looking at him across the hall while Jared was obviously talking about him. So, Jensen tried to appear as formal as possible, so that he wouldn’t give away any vital information.

The first course of the meal was served, and it was a tiny fillet of Salmon on a bed of roasted eggplant mash, topped with herbs and caviar. It was delicious and Jensen realized that he was indeed hungry since he hadn’t eaten anything before coming to the party.

As they finished eating the first course, the plates were cleared and were replaced with main which turned out to be several thinly sliced pieces steak with sauce and potatoes & veggies on the side.

He noticed that Jared was picking at his food right across from him, and he peeked up to find him stealing glances at Jensen. For a moment, they locked eyes and Jensen found electric shocks delivered to his groin at the intensity of those eyes. Plus, he was able to sense something else in them, like abject misery and a yearning, but it was gone in a flash and Jared shifted his glance to his plate and continued nodding his head to Gen’s chatter.

The waiters came in once again and cleared the plates in front of them and he noticed that Jared hadn’t eaten much. Soon, the final course arrived, a plate of caramel pudding with crispy burnt caramel on top.

As Jensen was digging into the last few spoonsful of the custard, he heard someone ask, “So, what is it that you do, doctor?”

Jensen looked startled at the source of the voice and found that it was Camille, trying to strike a conversation with him. The chatter around the table died down about the same time, and the following silence put all the attention on Jensen, and he was momentarily stunned.

Camille changed her question to be specific, “I mean, are you a physician or a specialist or a surgeon?”

“I… am a specialist.”

“In what discipline?”

“I..,” Jensen paused for a moment before stating, “..Am an andrologist.”

“Um.. What does that mean?”

“Oh, I know,” interjected Peter as he continued, “It means you are a specialist for hormonal problems, am I right?”

Jensen shook his head hesitantly, “It means I treat mostly only male patients.”

“What?” gasped Peter, “That’s a little sexist, right? Why only male patients? Why not females?” He laughed as if he cracked a great joke and Camille joined him.

Jensen chuckled a bit nervously. “No, I treat men-specific problems.”

There was a silence around the table and Jensen involuntarily looked up at Jared. Jared was staring at him with wide eyes and as he caught Jensen’s nervous look, licked his lips, anxiously.

“I’m sorry for being an illiterate, but what would men-specific problems mean?” asked Peter.

Jensen sighed and about to speak when Daneel interrupted, “It means he treats men’s troubles with their private parts. He is sort of a urologist and sexologist all rolled into one.”

“Oh, dear God, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to sound so ignorant, but thanks for clarifying that,” said Peter, laughing aloud. He then added, “So, a sexologist, huh? Should make women flock to you like moths to flame, not to mention, given your suave looks, that mustn’t be difficult at all, huh?”

Jensen shifted his eyes to Jared and Jared looked incensed. He was looking at this dessert plate, but Jensen could make out that he was controlling his temper as was evident from him clutching his fists.

“Yeah..” chuckled Jensen, “I’m not much of a lady’s man though. But I love my job, nevertheless.”

“What do you mean you are not a lady’s man, you look like a film star, you are a sexologist which means you should be well versed in the subject, so, you should be putting that knowledge to good use, Mr. Ackles,” laughed Peter and Camille joined him. Jensen heard Gen laugh with them too, albeit a bit nervously.

“Um, Jensen here, is Gay,” interjected Daneel and Jensen cursed himself, silently. The man sounded like a jerk and he would have preferred to bypass that last comment, but the damage was done.

A pin-drop silence descended on the table and this time it extended for a whole half minute. Jensen gave a furtive glance around the table and found that most of them were staring at him like he said he had just murdered someone. Jared looked absolutely stunned and Gen was staring at him with wide eyes. Gerald looked surprised too but as Jensen’s eyes met Sharon’s, she winked and nodded her head like she approved.

He heard a soft “Well done, dude,” from his immediate left from Chad and turned to him and said, “thanks.”

“Gay.. meaning you are into guys?” Peter asked incredulously as if he couldn’t get behind the fact.

“Yes, I’m afraid so,” replied Jensen.

“Oh dear!” exclaimed Peter. “All that wonderful opportunity gone to waste, huh?” he said and continued, “Or is it? Mr. Ackles, but I wonder, how do men come to you knowing that you are into dicks?”

It was as much Jensen could do to control his fury as he clutched his hands into tight fists by his side and didn’t look up.

Daneel, spoke up, “Mr. Cortez, I’m sure you are aware that I and Meg are gay too and are married to each other, right?”

“Yes, I’m aware. I’m not saying that men being gay is wrong. But I am surprised to see such a young, good looking doctor could be one. Seems like a total waste to me.”

“With due respect to you sir, I’m amazed that you are not surprised that us two women architects are lesbians, but you are surprised that a male doctor is gay?” She asked incredulously.

“I don’t mean to be judgmental but marrying a woman and giving her babies is one of the first and foremost duties of a man, in my opinion. I have special respect for such men.”

Jensen laughed. “Respect? I’ll tell you what I respect, Mr. Cortez. Do you know the percentage of engaged and married men who come to me for treatment, desperate that they can’t perform in the bedroom because they are gay in real life?” he asked without glancing at Jared.

He continued as Peter was staring at him in stunned silence, “You just have no idea how many innocent lives these men have been ruining because they couldn’t give up their toxic masculinity and announce to the world that they are gay. None of them know that I am gay, but I know how many men out there who are, and who live their life in secret, having a wife and children at home, but running away to their boy-toys during the weekends. I prefer being open, being proud of my sexuality and living a life with dignity than living such pathetic, loser lives like them.” Jensen tossed the napkin on his plate and got up from his seat. “I’m sorry Mr. Cortez, but I have to leave now. Thanks for the wonderful party. You can send the bill for my drinks and food to my clinic and I will see to that I pay up including a huge tip for the service. So long, Mr and Mrs. Padalecki and congrats once again to the engaged couple. Have a great night.” Jensen left the table without giving them another glance and continued walking towards the door to the house from the backyard.

Once he reached the living room, he continued walking past the housemaid who came to help him with his coat. He still didn’t stop, as he opened the main door and stepped out, walking briskly until he came to the big iron gates. He got out and seeing a passing taxi, he flagged it down, got in and gave him the address.

It wasn’t until two minutes into the taxi ride that he found himself burning and seething in anger, with bitter tears rolling down his cheeks and falling on his hands in his lap.

Jensen did not even bother to wipe them away as he was finally giving in to the misery of falling in love and losing his heart to the boy who couldn’t even bother to stand up for him when his future father-in-law was calling him a useless fag.

====================================================================================


End file.
